Scanner Reports 5-18-20

By Roger the Scanner Guy

I had a funny story to tell all of you today with all the horrible things going on in all of our lives. Humor wins it, keeps us going when the chips are down and they are down in my life right now. As you know my Mom passed away recently there is a little bit of money left for all of us who are left, but some think they deserve more than others and they are willing to break the law to get it. Sunday morning I opened up my Facebook page and saw a threat toward me from a Nephew I never met, he is a bodybuilder tough guy, enjoys getting drunk and beating old dumb ass hippies up. He called me a dumb ass hippie, his mother, my older sister, called me that. I told them all to keep the money, leave me alone I’m calling the police, the threats disappeared. I think he is going to make good on those threats, he is a dangerous person just like his father. I hate drama, I like it in the movies I don’t want it in my life. I’m a crippled old dumb ass hippie. I was looking forward to paying off some bills, paying for my disposal after my Nephew murders me, I really want to change my name and get the hell away from all of my so-called loved ones, a mass restraining order against all of them. “Keep the Fucking money and stay the Fuck away from me.”  That is all I want to say to them. I’m in FaceBook jail now and cannot defriend or block any of them, I wish they had FaceBook maximum Security or FaceBook Protective Custody I’ll snitch them all out. FaceBook put me in Population Dirty Rats they wanted to teach me a lesson. They did it all right. No more smart ass comments after my 30 days in the hole I’ll be eating Humble Pie the rest of my days. If anyone comes to my door to beat up this old dumb ass hippie I’ll snort black pepper and sneeze a big hunk of SNOT in their face we will go together. There is a lot of SNOT in this old dumb ass hippie someone better be wearing a mask! A good friend says “Death brings out the worse in people.” That is no lie…Anyway I found this guy on You Tube that posts about his life and it is really quite funny check him out he calls himself The Homeless Firefighter he is very funny check him out….HERE IS YOUR SCANNER REPORTS.

Scanner Reports, Friday:

  • Minor injury traffic accident involving a drunk driver in a grey Buick 2981 Cliff Drive.
  • 1000 Block of East Mason burglary.
  • Check the welfare of a subject under a blanket in the 200 Block of Natoma, a grey blanket.
  • 415pc Subject yelling profanities in the 2000 Block of DLV.
  • Subject had banged on the windows and put a hole in the wall of The Marina Beach Motel overnight reporting party says the subject is  now in front of the motel
  • Nonhazmat clean up auto accident 2981 Cliff Drive.
  • Anacapa at Guiterrez 242pc Assault.
  • Med Call with PD Response 3618 State street.
  • Modoc at Los Positas traffic Accident.
  • Garden at Anapamu traffic signal facing the wrong way.
  • The suspicious person hanging out in the stairwell of city Lot 6 wearing all black, with a black bicycle yes that is very suspicious.
  • 911 Hang Up 100 Block of North Alisos.
  • Suspicious subject possibly using drugs in the area of the 1000 Block of Miramonte.
  • 415pc Transient 2900 Block of State street.
  • 211 Silent no robbery in the 500 Block of North Milpas street.
  • Premises check Oak Park.
  • Trespasser ongoing issue 34 Los Patos Way.
  • Check the Welfare of a man down on the sidewalk Anacapa and Mission.
  • Medical call Santa Catalina Dorms UCSB.
  • 2500 Block of Treasure Drive medical call.


Scanner Reports, Saturday:

  • Mountain Lion sighting Dwight Murphy Park 1:55 am, call came in here close to 5 am, one of the scariest things is being face to face with an unsecured  frightened animal. I came face to face with a Lynx aka Bob Cat once before they put in the Cacique underpass. I was chasing it like a friggen idiot because I wanted it to go home so no one would mess with it….It turned on me with those eyes and howled damn near filled my shorts…I had to go home and have a few beers just to calm down those were my drinking days. WHEN THEY SAY SHELTER IN PLACE YOU STAY HOME.
  • 415pc Yellers possible 415 Domestic 300 Block of Ladera.
  • 459pc Audible alarm 2700 Block of State street
  • Check the Welfare of an elderly person who keeps calling 911 and when they answer yells “HELLO!?” Too funny somewhere on the West Side
  • 415pc Between a transient and an employee of Blenders in the Grass 720 State street the employee got pepper sprayed
  • 2500 Block of DLV Subject trespassing telling reporting party that he has personal property at the address in the 2500 Block of DLV
  • Hazardous condition Shoreline Drive at San Rafael
  • Structure Fire Oliver Road, It was Food on the Stove
  • Burglary investigation 500 Block of salsipuedes
  • 415pc Argument over a vehicle vs bicyclist accident on Elise Way. possible pepper spray involved I think someone was in possession of it. No one was pepper sprayed
  • Code 2 Medic’s were dispatched to Blenders for a pepper spray injury.
  • Medical PATH 816 Cacique for a subject down bleeding
  • Medical call 4500 Block of Dearborne
  • Med call DLV and West Mission street
  • Traumatic injury male down bleeding outside Albertsons in the 7100 Block of Hollister
  • Drunk guy kicking stairs near the beach on Channel Drive.
  • 415pc Transient refusing to leave the 76 Station 200 Block of South Milpas and sitting in the doorway, his butt is going to be really dirty
  • Vehicle vs Motorcycle 2800 Block of Highway 166.
  • Nude or Lewd 700 Block of DLG Plaza male in his 50’s sitting on the grass.
  • Male sitting in a vehicle with an open container Broodmar Plaza and State street white GMC.
  • Check the welfare of a male lying in bushes next to a palm tree 40 South Milpas.
  • Medical call 321 Anacapa RTI.
  • Medical call San Ysidro Trail unknown exact location on the trail.
  • Suspicious subjects in a brown Suburban 34 Los Patos Way 2 women in vehicle on going issue.
  • Bicyclist down injuries Los Positas at Cliff Drive.


Scanner Reports, Sunday: 

  • First thing this morning heard about the mountain Lion sighting on Por La Mar 2nd day in the row same area… Por La Mar, Ninos Drive.
  • Medical call 100 Block of Castillo.
  • Violation of a restraining order 1020 Chapala MTD
  • Burglary investigation 800 Block of East Anapamu.
  • Figueroa at State street 20 juveniles in traffic.
  • Vandalism to Smart and Final and a City bench 217 East Guiterrez.
  • Full Santa Barbara city Fire Department response for a fire on a fence next to a building fire was out quick full response was cancelled 1100 Block of Chino.
  • Illegal camper in a silver van in the 200 Block of West Guiterrez has all his things spread out on the sidewalk.
  • Park 2 is on some skaters at Skaters Point.
  • Traffic stop on a bicyclist 900 Block of State street
  • Fall victim Medical call 700 Block of Shepard Mesa Road.
  • Follow Up case Crown Liquor.
  • Drunk people engaging in sexual behavior near the Sea Landing 200 Block of West Cabrillo.
  • Douche Bag attemptted to steal a tip jar 21 North Milpas on going issue black shirt, grey panties.
  • Premises check Douglas Family Preserve 2900 Block of Cliff Drive.
  • Medical call 6647 El Colegio in Isla Vista.
  • Medical call 100 Block of West Sola.
  • Medical call on Star Pine Road in Carpinteria.
  • First Block of North Alisos Medical call.
  • 415Ppc Of sorts sounded confusing theft of a wallet that had not been taken at all by a female who was leaving the scene on foot in the 600 Block of West Sola. Though when the police responded she ran, and resisted so more units responded code 3 and they had a charge against her that was not 148 Obstruction of Justice so off she went.
  • 415pc Possible fight involving transients Montecito and Castillo.
  • 415pc Transient spit in an employees face at the Harborview Inn 28 West Cabrillo BMA left Northbound on State street, SBPD responding.


I have had all day to think about this insanity in my life. I threatened legal action quickly and I meant it though wondering why my mother would have willed me the ownership of my Little Sisters Life Insurance policy. I’m not sure how to do the right thing in this circumstance but I think my mother wanted me to get my little sister the money from that policy and I will do my best to do just that. I’m going to have help, I’m going to do everything legal from here on out. I don’t know why my little Sister lied to her Son and told him that I threatened to hurt her maybe they were all drunk. “You want to hurt my Mother I will come to your house blah, blah,blah…..Dumb ass old hippie.” I was thinking of cutting my hair but after that this dumb ass old hippie is growing it down to my ass! No more weird crap. Go Away Stay Away from now on only funny stories although some of you are laughing at this I’m sure…Have a Wonderful MONday-MONday…Peter, Molly, Belinda, Midnight, Merlin, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Lola, PoPo, Shadow, FREDDIE!,Maxwell, Liza, Zoey, Tom Cat, Tomicina, Tiger, Clancy, Tiny, Andy, FISH HEADS ONE, AND TWO, Poncho, Denny, Zeke, Jerry, Ealter, Fred, Jonathan, C.J., Brad, Billy, Carl, Stan, Kent, ELMO, Patrick, Christy, Diana, Jim, Ross, Rambo, Sherry, Eddie, Bambi, Pat, Mavis, Mark, Willie, Lafayette, Ted, Bengie, Ricky, Mrs. MacArthur, Auntie Helen, David Cox, Po, Marty, Cop John, Magruder, Don, Edwin, Cory, Crazy Ed, Bommy, Poppy, June, Muskie, Roger, Father Zimmerman, Joseph, Debbie, Ken, Isabelle, Jerry, LUCY! STOBE THE HOBO, KFC, John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks, Ron Santo, John Havlick, Little Mac, John Prime, Tom Petty, Rich Mullins, Bill, John, Marianne, and Chris Willing we will see you on HUMP DAY.  Later,  Roger…P.S. Some people should not drink alcohol.


Written by Roger

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  1. I can totally sympathize with you and your horrible family situation. When my mother passed away a couple years ago, my half-sister & her husband, grabbed nearly all the $$$$ and, we’re talking about, well over $400,000. in cash value, and probably much more. Despicable, to say the least. And, they acted like it was nothing…. When my brother passed away, I did the right thing, and followed his wishes and his written Will , and if any of his friends had a “special” request for something, I would honor that. if I could…. like, one of his friends wanted his recipe for Guacamole … etc. I just feel that, no matter how you feel about someone, you still have to do the right thing…….. just set those bad feelings aside, and do the “right” thing….. And, a friend was executor on a very small estate, and she wouldn’t give a relative the small amount of money, like under $100. because the girl was a drug addict……….she didn’t even let the girl know about the inheritance…… My “friend” could have given that $$$$ in a different way, so she wouldn’t have wasted it on drugs. Could have given her gift cards, or a credit at a grocery store….. That drug addict might have changed her life, if she knew her relative had thought so much about her, to leave her any money….. Very very sad… and thoughtless of my friend. and illegal too !! My “friend” dropped down to nearly the bottom of my “friend” list,and I know I wouldn’t be able to trust her with anything… ((( I need to step away from the coffee !!!!! )))) talking too much !!!

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