Scanner Reports 4-29-19

By Roger the Scanner Guy

I hope you all had a good weekend mine was A-OK. I have been reading a little about the skunk problem in Carpinteria. I love the smell of skunks, maybe it’s because I grew up in NorthWest Indiana near a wooded area we had a lot of skunks back there, they were all over the place. Folks let their dogs out to chase them away they’d come back smelling like skunks, Love that smell. We have them here too. One night Joey was wrestling with what I thought was another cat rolling on the ground outside my door. I opened it Joey jumped up took off cat/ skunk sprayed got me and the place But Hell I did not mind I love that smell! I don’t mind skunks at all cute little shits too. Hopefully, you all down in Carpinteria can work this out with the skunks they deserve to live there too go ahead and let em spray you a couple times you’ll get used to the smell after a while you’ll love the smell of a skunk too.

I was getting off the bus the other day there was a guy at the bus stop had a 24 inch Trek mountain bike silver and maroon asks me like a used car salesman, “How much do you think this bike is worth? Go Ahead Guess!” I did not care because I cannot ride a bike anymore, he was insistent. I did not think about it but I should have called THE LAW, Bike was probably HOT. Anyone get a bicycle ripped off lately 24 inch Trek maroon and silver let me know.

John Havlicek passed away the other day he was my favorite ball player. When I was growing up My Folks put me in basketball camp when I was a youngin because they knew I was going to be tall I loved watching John play whenever I got to see the Celtics play which wasn’t much because back then cable wasn’t what it is today you pretty much got to see your home teams and that was about it. I haven’t played ball in years can’t anymore John Havlicek You will be missed Rest in Peace…Here be your Scanner Roni Reports..

Scanner Reports FRYday:

  • Neck pain Ortega Park 5:44am
  • Check the Welfare of 3 Juveniles living with Dad he got custody Ex Wife thinks his place is too small somewhere on the East Side no address given Mom will meet responding officers at Alisos and DLG.
  • Squatters discovered in a unit that was to be rented out by a house cleaner who  responded to clean the apartment in the 200 Block of Bath street.
  • Male under the influence refusing to leave Starbucks in the 800 Block of State street.
  • Juvenile problem kid refusing to go to school on Alisos.
  • Vandalism at McKinley School.
  • 23152 Female Drunk Driver 60 years old wearing pink and black exposed herself, No Thanks driving a white Lexus with paper plates maybe she was the stripper at the BBQ. Anapamu, and Anacapa. I think they caught up with her at Figueroa and Anacapa.
  • Keep the peace 1400 Block of Schoolhouse road.
  • Female harassing citizens trying to get their signatures at the Grocery Outlet 2840 DLV.
  • Window peeper in the 1300 Block of San Andres.
  • Suspicious subject selling items from a Mercedes panel truck in the parking lot of Wells Fargo in the 3800 Block of State street.
  • Violation of a restraining order in the 200 Block of North Milpas street.
  • 415 Yeller in the 1800 Block of Cliff Drive.
  • Premises check Chase Palm Park Extention.
  • Drinkers near the basement steps city lot 9 1200 Block of Anacapa.
  • UI Male refusing to leave Ralphs 100 Block of West Carrillo.
  • Vehicle theft 1000 Block of Alphonse.
  • Ex boyfiend in Ex girl friends house while she is out of town stealing things 1800 Block of Mountain Avenue.
  • Med Call 300 Block of Hot Springs fall from the roof of Casa Dorinda.
  • An reporting party discovered his stolen license plate on another vehicle at the YMCA at 36 Hitchcock the plate was on a grey  Ford Explorer
  • Check the welfare of a female at 29 North Milpas with blood on her face with a hand injury
  • 600 Block of Bath street non injury hit and run
  • Ducklings in the storm drain 4800 Block of Arrowhead Circle Ventura
  • Burglary investigation First Block of Anacapa
  • Trash Can Fire ocean side 100 Block of West Cabrillo.


Scanner Reports, Saturday:

  • Trespasser in the 1600 Block of State street at a business WMA in his 50’s
  • Med Call for a fall victim Cota at Voluntario
  • Premises check Vera Cruz Park
  • Transient refusing to leave the lobby of the Montecito Inn
  • Burglary to the Rose Cafe 400 Block of East Haley. I wonder if they still have the camper problem around the corner there
  • Mom and Dad got drunk and beat up their 14 year old in the 1300 Block of Robbins street
  • Domestic Violence on the Cacique Foot Bridge male shoves female 1200 Block of Cacique
  • Chase Palm Park rec center premises check
  • Santa Barbara High School Tennis Courts premises check
  • Possible burglary to mailboxes 200 Block of Grove Lane.
  • Premises check Adams School.
  • Wanted subject at Rite Aide 35 South Milpas.
  • Stolen Vehicle recovery in the 400 Block of West Pedregosa a blue Chevy Silverado.
  • Med call fall victim Figueroa at State street.
  • Drunk female in a taxi in front of the police station refusing to pay and too drunk to get out.
  • Somewhere a pedestrian was hit and killed by an Amtrak train but I could not figure the exact location Sounded like North County Santa Barbara.
  • Premises check Cleveland School.
  • 415 Transient 512 State street possibly abusive to an animal.
  • Trespasser at Ralphs 100 Block of West Carrillo reporting party will sign a complaint.
  • Theft investigation 6600 Block of Picasso.
  • Hazard investigation subject pumped diesel into the storm drain 800 Block of East Ortega.
  • 800 Block of Vincente Way 10851 Vehicle theft.
  • 415 Domestic 1000 Block of Cliff or 300 Block of Oceano male yelling at female threatening to stab her then both victim and suspect got aggressive and threatening with the neighbors who called the police on them. I would have called the police too just about anyone would it’s against the law to yell at people and threaten to stab them.
  • Med Call Alcohol poisoning 500 Block of Anacapa.
  • There was a subject who had been in a wheel chair but was dumped out of the chair by 5 scum bags  he was calling for help from Montecito and Castillo in a field, the subjects who did it were last seen heading toward the tracks.
  • 20001 Investigation minor injury felony hit and run 402 West Mission.
  • 23152 Drunk Driver in a blue Ford Escape West on Carrillo from Garden street cannot remember where they pulled over in a city parking lot but they were a drunk driver another citizen a sober one followed them and  reported their whereabouts to police.
  • Female down in the dirt possibly unconscious in a vacant lot Haley at Garden streets.
  • Unresponsive subject back of the county jail med call.
  • 415 in a parking lot at Subway in the 3900 Block of State street someone possibly used pepper spray.
  • 415 Subject suicidal outside Cottage ER 5150 NO WEAPONS.
  • Check the welfare of a disoriented female in the lobby of Cottage ER


Scanner Reports, Sunday:

  • Unknown med call 2900 Block of Pleasta Del Sol.
  • Premises check Oak Park.
  • Premises check Earl Warren.
  • Med Call Earl Warren for a subject kicked in the head by a bull.
  • Ongoing theft of food by a female at Hotel Milo 202 West Cabrillo stealing items in the lobby did not hear what it was this time but it was food in the past.
  • 23103 Reckless driver in a black BMW Westbound on Mason From Chapala.
  • Fall victim at Vista Del Monte with rib pain in the 3700 Block of Modoc.
  • Illegal camper in the doorway 607 State street.
  • Premises check Cottage Hospital.
  • Med Call ill subject at the Faulding Hotel 15 East Haley.
  • Video Alarm 400 Block of North Quinientos.
  • Subject stealing food at Ralphs 100 Block of West Carrillo spat on some kids and threw metal chairs he was caught and taken into custody near MTD at Lunch time he enjoyed a nice gourmet meal at the Santa Barbara county jail.
  • 10851 Stolen VW last seen at Anacapa and Haley streets.
  • Van one was on a SMOKER at 1209 State street.
  • Med call in a church 36 East Victoria.
  • Check the welfare of a male down next to a sidewalk 414 East Sola street.
  • Another weiner 242 Assaulted a handicapped female near Marina 3 then threatened to stab her was last seen walking toward Marina 4 but Not so fast detained in the parking lot and then arrested. Too bad not forever.
  • 2 Transients smoking out of a beaker in thy blessed MILPAS UNDERPANTS.
  • 6 Males in the breezeway of lot 6 with open containers city lot 2/ 900 Block of Chapala.
  • Fall victim injury Skaters Point.
  • Med call unconscious male in a bath tub 600 Block of West Mission.
  • Premises check Harding school.
  • Camper 300 Block of Laguna near the encampment on the 101 Offramp.


Will dat is all outta me for now Have a Wonderful MONday-MONday…Peter, Molly, Belinda, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Tom Cat, Clancy, Tiger, Thomicina, Midnight, Merlin,Maxwell, Lola, PoPo, Shadow, FREDDIE! Tiny, Andy, Fish Head One and Two, Poncho, Denny Deem, Jerry, Walter, Fred, Jonathan, C.J., Brad Billy, Carl, Stan, Kent, ELMO, Patrick, Christy, Diana, Jim, Rambo, Sherry, David Cox, Po, Marty, Cop John, Bommy, Poppy, June, Muskie, Eddie, Bambi, Bengie, Ricky, Mavis, Pat, Lafayette, Ted,Willie, Magruder, Don, Edwin, Cory, Crazy Ed, Mark, Isabelle, Jerry,.Debbie, Ken, LUCY! STOBE THE HOBO, John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, John Havlicek, Ernie Banks, Ron Santo, Tom Petty, and Chris Willing we will pee you on WEDnesday..Later,  Roger


Written by Roger

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  1. Skunk Boy,
    The skunk smell problem in Carpinteria has to do with the human animals and greed, not the little critters. I hope the City starts spraying back, with Round Up , or at least round up the skunks who are stinking up the place. Greedy little creatures, bent on profiting on human weakness. A blot on the human condition! A pox upon their plants! Fie, fie fie!!! Someone please start putting up hex signs on their barns! This close to the ocean they could protract rickets and scurvy on their wretched bodies, the bloody pirates! My father-in-law served on Iwo Jima and Bougainville and crawled through miles of bougainvillea, bleeding and sweating, and every time someone would mention the plant he would curse and spit. I feel the same way about the vile weed. It causes insanity and paranoia and laziness. I have seen college students’ grades plummet, their interest in success destroyed by it. Perhaps some devasting, unstoppable weevil will come along and end the problem organically, getting fat and happy doing it, spreading joy and good feelings throughout the world. It will probably come from the Amazon!

Nets Removed from Venoco Pier

Traffic Collision On Islay