Scanner Reports 3-7-18

By Roger the Scanner Guy

I was just telling him, “Joey Please DON’T bring in any more mice, Please Joey listen to me.” I says. “I don’t like trying to catch them I’m an old man, I cannot catch them. Please Joey no more MICE! PLEASE!” I thought I was getting through to him, 2 minutes later having my coffee little BASS TURD BRINGS IN A FRIGGEN MOUSE! ANOTHER FRIGGEN MOUSE!!! Chases it around for a second then jumps out the pet door. Gone! He runs away. I hadn’t even had my coffee yet, I had to try and catch the little prick. I tried but in the end the mouse came after me and I jumped up for the first time in years cause I thought the little booger was gonna go up my leg. I ran away out of my little house down the road screaming. They can have it I’ll sleep outside. Damn Cat!

So I guess we got a prowler over there in the Las Positas area heard a call posted a Roger Report on it, 2700 Block MONday evening guy on the back porch of a home trying a door, kinda gutsy doing that when Folks are home, scary too. It’s calls like that where I think a firearm in the home is a good idea. I’m for some people not having access to guns, but in order to protect our lives in our own homes when someone breaks in, guns are a necessary tool. There are some people in this world that would kill you for a buck, and some who torture others for the pure enjoyment of it. I have been tortured and believe me YOU DON’T WANT TO EVER GO THROUGH IT. In the end I had to fight my way out of it, the guy had a knife and though the cuts I received were not deep it was scary, very scary. Before I fought back the torture lasted awhile and I thought I was going to die. I got the best of the sonofabitch, fighting back even though he had a knife I should have killed him but I didn’t. I thought if I did I’d get locked up and NEVER let out because I had a violent past and it wasn’t the first time. I’d been in almost the same situation having to fight back and that time the molester did not survive but I did. No one would have ever known about it had I not told my Step Dad who went to his Brother who was a Chicago Cop but it was good that I did because I did not like cops very much until then. My Step Uncle changed my mind of how I thought about cops. I was still not straight as far as being more on the criminal side of things but I respected the police more than I had before and it began to change the direction of my life. I have a BB Gun it’s not a real gun but it still hurts to get shot with a BB Gun and one time years ago I angered some neighbors who took delight in beating up homeless drunks. They went after Belinda thinking she was homeless and I went after them and they called the police on me, 4 of them called the police on me crying like babies after trying to attack my girlfriend.

Anyway, they came to my door one night and tried to break it down when I was asleep I woke up and grabbed my Trusty “Pink” Daisy BB GUN and pumped it several times and growled “Who the @$@%@ IS IT?” It sounded like a .12 Gauge they all ran away. Punks they moved out soon after. Hopefully this Prowler will move on and not try to break in any more occupied homes but I doubt it When it comes down to it it’s better to lose things then to have to fight for your life, things can be replaced. I hope the guy got shook up enough when discovered he goes straight even so where ever you live Always make sure your Home is secure whether you’re at home or not and especially before you go to sleep.

Scanner Reports, Monday: 

• Forged prescription at Rite Aide 35 South Milpas suspects took off before the SBPD could fill it. No Problem it will be filled elsewhere.
• Suicidal subject on San Pascual in a residence she left before police could respond also hopefully she will ask for help before trying to end it all.
• 415 Neighbors in the 400 Block of Via Rosa.
• Unconscious male in a red truck in the 2700 Block of DLV, He was sleeping.
• Traffic Hazard, Male with grey hair riding a bicycle highway 101 Southbound near Hot Springs.
• Medical Call Unknown type 300 Block of Valley View in a garage.
• Subject South Bound from Trader Joes with his pants down, That must be Saggy.
• Ill subject at the V.A. Medical call 4440 Calle Real.
• 415 Fight involving 2 males one female with a juvenile on scene there Los Almos Park 4900 Block of Drum Canyon.
• Video pickup from a Liquor store on DLV Where a crime was committed.
• Check the Welfare of a subject laying in the parking lot at I-Hop on Calle Real.
• Subject wearing a Black ball cap tried to pass a phony 100.00 Dollar Bill at Hamburger Habit 216 South Milpas I saw police speaking to him but don’t know where it went after that.
• Vehicle accident Hummal Drive at Union Valley in Santa Maria.
• Suicide Attempt on Sumida Gardens in Goleta.
• Homeless male refusing to leave the bushes at 203 Chapala street.
• Medical call ill subject DLG at Milpas.
• 415 Subject refusing to leave I-Hop on Calle Real.
• Illegal burn Smoke check 2300 Block of Los Canoas.
• Code 2 Medical call at the Soloman grade.
• Camper in a parking space at Silly Hall 735 Anacapa, good way to get runned over.
• Theft investigation Vera Cruz Park 130 East Haley.

Scanner Reports, Tuesday:

• Suspicious circumstances Reporting party heard a woman crying then glass breaking in the 1600 Block of State street near by.
• 415 Subject yelling while attempting to steal merchandise at the Grocery Outlet 2840 DLV.
• 415 Over a subject taking rocks from Ledbetter beach Asian male vs Surfer.
• Possible Fall victim in a unit at 315 West Carrillo.
• 500 Block of DLV Subject sitting on a front porch in that block has warrants.
• Medical call UNconscious subject at Goleta beach.
• Report of an unconscious subject alongside of the 101 Southbound between Carrillo and Castillo was actually 2 subjects both of them sleeping.
• 415 At Harding school heavyset 5th grader 6 feet tall yelling broke a door. That was the grade I was in the first time I snapped in school too I could not take being bullied anymore.
• Elderly female calling for help on Old Mill Road 300 Block SBSO responded and requested the Fire department for assistance I did not hear any more after that.
• Subject down 800 Block of North Milpas.
• Carbon Mixode alarm going off in residence in the 300 Block of West Mission Truck one Engine 5 responded.
• Video feed from Santa Barbara motor sports shows trespasser in fenced in yard snooping around.
• Smoke investigation near the Santa Barbara County Bowl.
• Eviction assist 300 Block of West Pedregosa.
• Medical call for subject in a Taxi Cab just released from the hospital turned into an Assault when the patient attacked the Taxi Cab driver 800 Block of Laguna.
• 4 Subjects with open containers of alcohol hanging out near Jiffy Lube in the 900 Block of DLV.
• 200 South Milpas a problem child causing problems female threw coffee on workers at the 76 station at Cacique and Milpas, was involved in a physical fight with another woman in the 300 Block of South Milpas. Was involved in another disturbance in the area before that.
• Attempt Suicide in the Court House Superior Court department 8  / 118 East Figourea by hanging.

Sometimes calls are weird, sometimes funny, sometimes tragic and sad but all of them somehow help me make it from one day to the next One scanner report at a time…  Will that is all outta me for now Have a great WEDnesday…Peter, Belinda, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Midnight, Merlin, Thomsina, Clancy, Fish Head One, Poncho, Jerry, Jonathan, C.J., Walter, Fred, Brad, Billy, Carl, Kent, Stan, ELMO, Patrick, Christy, Diana, Jim, Rambo, Sherry, Bommy, Poppy, Bengy, Ricky, Marty, Cop John, David Cox, Poe, Pat, Magruder, Don, Edwin, Cory, Isabelle, Jerry, John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks, Tom Petty, and Chris Willing we will see you on FRYday.