Scanner Reports 10-11-19

By Roger the Scanner Guy

The last time I got Drunk I took a bunch of pills too. I was tired of everything and I wanted out, I called an old girlfriend to say Good Bye. I probably wanted attention but I was in a total blackout and to this day over 16 years later I don’t remember calling her. She called the police and two responded. I told them I had a gun and they came in anyway climbing through a window. The thanks they got for saving me is I barfed on one and called him “Butt Ugly.” Some might think spirituality got ahold of my ass and kept me sober all these years, I’m sure that is part of it, but there were many times I have thought of drinking again only to be faced with that memory of calling the responding Police Officer “Butt Ugly” and spitting up on him and there is No Friggen Way in Hell I want to do that again. I was lucky I lived through it the first time.

Cops go through this all the time being treated with total disrespect. I was drunk I don’t do this sober. There was a time that I did not, l treat them with respect sober though I only barfed or got combative when I was drunk. What changed my mind about how I feel about cops was working Security and as a bouncer in a couple bars. I got beat up at the West Side Boys Club working a party some gang members attacked me, my so-called partner ran away. I got thrashed pretty good taught me a lesson about how other people in uniform are treated. Police Officers might make a lot of money with overtime but it’s not from sitting on their ass in their cars driving around. The work of a police officer is not easy, it’s very hazardous, and stressful if you don’t think so you do it. If you’re crazy like me and cannot be a cop try being a bouncer, or a security guard they get treated like shit too That is my MILPAS UNDERPANTS AND I’M STICKING TO THEM.

Scanner Reports, Wednesday:

  • Highway 135 at Union Valley traffic Accident.
  • Highway 135 at Foster Traffic Accident
  • Check the Welfare of a subject down on the sidewalk Quarantina at Haley streets
  • Burglary Northend Santa Barbara City
  • Sexual Battery 700 Block of East Anapamu
  • Juveniles fighting SB JR. High now in the office 721 East Cota
  • Suspicious Gas men checking gas lines 1600 Block of Los Canolas
  • MTD bus crash One pedestrian passed away rest in peace. The other in critical condition Figueroa at Chapala.
  • Fire Test Call at Station 5 in the 2500 Block of Modoc
  • 415pc Subject hitting a window in the 800 Block of Laguna street.-White Nissan Rogue Texting while driving Los Positas at Modoc
  • SBPD on a group of subjects 700 Block of West Cota street.
  • Injured subject on the Soccer Field, 1900 Block of Kate Mason Road
  • 911 Hang Up with yelling in the back round First Block of La Cadena
  • Check the Welfare of a subject making suicidal threats 400 Block of Dibley
  • Medical call 1000 Block of East Mason
  • Possible Overdose in the Homeless camp along the Rail Road Tracks at Los Positas fellow Homeless subjects gave patient 3 does of narcan before subject became alert
  • Subject seen using a lazer pointer in a vehicle East Bound on State from Broodmar Plaza
  • 10851 Stolen Vehicle 3700 Block of State street.
  • Attempt to locate a subject 1300 Block of San Pascual.


Scanner Reports, Thursday:

  • Injury traffic accident Modoc at Mission vehicle vs Pedestrian.
  • Highway 101 Southbound at Storke Minor injury accident
  • 3600 Block of Cliff Drive Animal Control on a deceased animal. Rest in Peace
  • Premises check Vera Cruz Park
  • Suspicious male wearing a black hoodie Mason street at Chapala something to do with a white Toyota
  • SBPD on a subject at Victoria and State street the subject is a registered Arsonist
  • Med call with police response man down 1200 Block of DLV
  • Prem check East Beach Volleyball courts
  • Prem check Vera Cruz Park
  • Suspicious bag at the County Admin Building 105 West Anapamu
  • Premises check Hillside across from Leadbetter Beach
  • Med call man down 501 Ninos
  • Code 60 Vehicle blocking 600 Block of San Pascual
  • Med Call 3900 Block of State street
  • 261 Rape investigation at the Police Station 215 East Figueroa
  • 900 Block of East Guiterrez 242 Assault elderly female on the ground male seen leaving the scene in a grey flat bed truck  female possibly has a head injury and could be a neighbor dispute between residents elderly.
  • Suspicious circumstances at SBHS 700 Block of Anapamu
  • Med Aide 1100 Block of DLV
  • Suspicious circumstances involving a patient at Cottage Hospital who believes she was drugged elsewhere before being admitted to the hospital
  • 314pc Goleta Community Center in the 5600 Block of Hollister
  • 242pc Assault Veterans Memorial  Building 112 West Cabrillo
  • 374pc Dumping of bodily waste 122 West Figueroa at the Social Security offices outside suspect in the lobby of the Social Security office
  • Med call Fellowship Club 617 Garden street.
  • 242 Assault investigation at the police station 215 East Figueroa
  • Possible Overdose in a blue Honda in SBCC parking lot 1000 Block of Cliff Drive


So on WEDnesday there was a new panhandler at the Milpas Southbound Offramp right there under the MILPAS UNDERPANTS she was well dressed and pretty good looking, she was working the traffic as if she had something for sale. The traffic stopped she walked half way up the ramp hitting everyone up for cash kinda reminded me of a politician for some reason. One guy drove by then kept honking as if he expected her to stop what she was doing and run-up to his old Honda, she looked like she was making too much money there oh well. Getting colder at night time to start wearing layers again I have been wearing my Long Johns and they are pretty comfortable. Will have a wonderful weekend…Peter, Molly, Belinda, Midnight, Merlin, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Shadow, FREDDIE!, Maxwell, Lola, PoPo,, Tom Cat, Clancy, Tomicina, Tiger, Tiny, Andy, Fish Heads One and Two, Poncho, Denny, Jerry, Walter, Fred, Jonathan, C.J., Brad, Billy, Carl, Stan, Kent, ELMO, Patrick, Christy, Diana, Jim, Ross, Rambo, Sherry, Eddie, Bambi, Lafayette, Ted, Pat, Mavis, Mrs. MacArthur, David Cox, Po, Marty, Cop John, Bengie, Ricky, Bommy, Poppy, June, Muskie, Magruder, Don, Edwin, Cory, Crazy Ed, Debbie, Ken, Isabelle, Jerry, LUCY!, STOBE THE HOBO, KFC, John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks, John Havlick, Ron Santo, Little Mac, Willie, Mark, Tom Petty, and Chris Willing we will see you on MONday-MONday.  Saturday will be the 5 year anniversary of Belinda’s Death and it still feels like yesterday, I Love You Belinda…Later,  Roger


Written by Roger

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  1. RE: Social Security Office::: Because the wait time can be really really long, they should have bathroom facilities available. Elderly waiting, parents with children waiting, folks with disabilities waiting…… etc…..

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