Feeling Distraught Over Your Dog’s Separation Anxiety? There is Absolutely Hope!

By Joan Hunter Mayer

Separation anxiety occurs when an animal is bonded with one specific person and suffers from severe anxiety when he or she is apart from that person. A similar challenge, isolation distress, occurs when a dog is anxious/distressed when entirely alone, but could be comfortable with any warm, human body present.

Dogs suffering from separation anxiety can exhibit some or all of the following behaviors when their humans are gone, or even as they are preparing to leave the home: pacing, vocalizing (including whining, howling, or barking), drooling, inappropriate elimination, repetitive licking or chewing of their paws or limbs, and/or destructive behaviors (particularly near doors/door jambs, windows/sills, or floors near doors and windows).

Helping Your Dog with Symptoms of Separation Anxiety

Separation anxiety is a heartbreaking condition that affects about 1 in 6 dogs in the United States. However, separation anxiety training can help your dog get to a place where they can tolerate and be comfortable with their time alone. This specialized training generally involves a multipronged approach that includes:

• using outside resources to help keep dogs under threshold (prevent panic),
• support for pet parents,
• and working with a professional.

Using Outside Resources to Help Keep Dogs Under Threshold

As is true of any fear-based behavior, separation anxiety training involves slowly and incrementally acclimating your dog to your departures, and increasing the time you are away at a pace that keeps your dog relaxed and free of fear. The term for preventing the onset of the fear response is keeping dogs ‘under threshold.’’ The key here is to leave your dog alone for no longer than the amount of time he or she can handle without panicking. Enlisting help from others to be with your dog when you cannot helps meet the needs of both you and your inquisitive canine. Outside resource options might include:

• Family and friends.
• Contacting your vet’s office — sometimes vet techs offer dog walking and pet sitting services outside of their clinic jobs. 
• Pet sitters, dog walkers, and doggy daycare – just be aware that like dog training, these industries are unregulated, so do your due diligence, be a critical thinker, read reviews and learn about their approaches and methods before committing to any services.
• Local colleges – hiring students to come to your home and spend the day studying and provide an occasional dog walk.
• People who want a dog but don’t have one (as long as they can have a dog in their home) – such as a retiree, a homebody who would like the company, or someone who works from home and would like an officemate for a few hours.

Support for Pet Parents

Although separation anxiety can be extremely concerning and frustrating, understanding and empathy are among the most important gifts guardians can give their dogs as they work through their fears. So, to keep up your own spirits, it can be helpful to remind yourself:

• Your dog is not punishing you for leaving. It can certainly feel like your dog’s separation anxiety symptoms are a way of getting back at you for leaving. This is not the case.
• Dogs experiencing separation anxiety are in a state of panic. They are not in control of their behavior any more than you would be if you were trembling and dry-mouthed about something that terrifies you, such as flying across the country, speaking in public, or hearing something unexpectedly go bump in the night. 
• Maintaining respect, compassion, and patience — for both yourself and your dog – strengthens the human-canine bond.
• Don’t worry if you do not have a clear understanding of what is causing your dog’s separation anxiety; it isn’t always clear why it occurs.
• Make sure your expectations are realistic and that what you envision matches your dog’s abilities. 
• Consider looking at your situation from a different perspective. Sometimes we need to stop and appreciate ALL the things that our dogs do that are completely endearing and wonderful!
• Like us, our dogs will have good days and not-so-good days — and that’s okay. 
• Remember, you are not alone.

Working with a Professional

Keep in mind that dogs are social animals; they are not pack animals. (That myth was debunked years ago!) Because we have bred and raised dogs to be companions to us humans, if we don’t provide companions and/or we don’t condition them to enjoy being alone, they could risk developing some variant of separation distress. Therefore, it’s helpful to work with someone who specializes in this scope of dog training and behavior modification. A reputable trainer will refer out if he or she feels a case is beyond their expertise. And, while separation anxiety is sometimes seen as a frustratingly intractable problem to solve, Certified Separation Anxiety Trainers (CSATs) use proven techniques that have helped countless dogs – and their families!

CSATs develop a customized protocol based on your dog’s particular behaviors, along with the goals you want to achieve. Since you will work together to implement the training plan, in addition to experience and certification, you will want to find someone whose training philosophy and methodology align with your own.

Just know, there absolutely is hope for dogs who suffer from separation anxiety and isolation distress – as well as their humans! With a little help, and a lot of patience, before you know it, you’ll be back to living a calm, peaceful life with a dog who is happy that you’re home, but is secure, confident, and able to enjoy their “me time” while you are gone.

Here’s to being inquisitive about helping dogs with separation anxiety!

The Inquisitive Canine was founded by Santa Barbara certified canine behavior consultant and certified professional dog trainer Joan Hunter Mayer. Joan and her team are devoted to offering humane, pawsitive, practical solutions that work for the challenges dogs and their humans face in everyday life. Joan offers coaching both in-person and online. If you are feeling inquisitive and have dog training questions, we invite you to contact The Inquisitive Canine for A Pawsitive Approach for Positive Results ™.