Scanner Reports 9-17-18

By Roger the Scanner Guy

I hope ya all had a good Weekend. Mine was OK, the usual nothing, big going on. I think Joey made another Gopher Friend, I hear a little booger scratching around at night trying to dig down thru the concrete floor. I hate it when he brings his friends home and they don’t leave then I gotta find a way to get them outta here. HELL I imagine it’s almost as rough as having a Rug Rat running around except these Rug Rats love eating their vegetables and yours too! Joey just loves bringing friends home but then when he is in here he walks around all paranoid like one of them is going to jump out and scare him. I have yet to buy a cucumber and scare the heck out of him with it. I saw this funny thing on Facebook, a guy wearing a cat mask saying he was going to feed his babies, all the cats were staring at his profile then he turns and they all ran away scared out of their wits. I gotta get me one of those masks, scare Joey with it heeheehee. I wonder if the cat mask will scare those other little shits outta here too. I don’t like killing the little critters I just want them out ,someone told me mint oil will get the critters out but then you gotta clean all the time, it’s hard constantly cleaning this place with dust floating around all the time but that is pretty much what it takes. There is so much dust in this little place it choked out my Shark Vacuum cleaner with their lifetime filters. Damn thing don’t work worth a darn anymore, I clean the filters 20 minutes later it’s crap again got to wear a face mask and sweep the place out with a broom, maybe I could train the critters to sweep the place out then I could pay em in vegetables that shouldn’t cost too much. I’m right down the street from Tri-County Produce I could hit their dumpster a couple times a week save a little money. I got good ideas when I stink with my noggin. That’s my MILPAS UNDERPANTS AND i’M STICKIN TO EM.

Scanner Reports, Friday:

Around 4am FRYday morning a husband heard an animal walking around his home the next morning animal prints were found I did not hear the address nor type of animal it was thought to be, or not to be.
SBPD requested to assist parole in the 400 Block of Anacapa.
415 Disturbance at conserve fuel 100 Block of South La Cumbre.
Suspicious black suitcase on the Micheltorena overcrossing I never heard what was inside of it.
Gas leak in senior apartments on South Kellogg.
Burglary to a vehicle 300 Block of Vista De La Cumbre.
459 Audible Alarm at Lillies Flowers 209 South Milpas no crime.
Illegal dwellers in the first block of Lorinda Place.
911 Hang Up no answer on call back Washington School 290 Lighthouse.
Medical call 617 Garden street female fainted.
Check the Welfare call at Carpinteria High School 4810 Foothill.
Fall victim Medical call 3700 Block of Monterey Pines.
Med call seizures at Milpas Liquor 317 Milpas street.
415 Homeless male disturbing in the 2600 Block of DLV.
Wires down 1500 Block of Mountain Ave.
415 Female yelling near Kids World.
100 Block of East Micheltorena Fall victim
484 Theft of a grocery cart full of groceries and alcohol Vons Turnpike suspect last seen North on Hollister in a vehicle a 4-door silver Toyota.
415 Homeless subject 2300 Block of DLV Heavy set male pushing a grocery cart.
Non injury hit and run investigation in the Lobby of the police department.
Subject saying inappropriate things to young children at the ballet studio 2009 DLV.
1144 Dead Body in the backyard of a residence in the 1500 Block of Clearview.
415 Suicidal subject in the Lobby of the ER at Cottage hospital.
Assault and Seizures in the 1300 Block of San Pascual.
242 Assault on Maggie Lane in the 200 Block.
Carpinteria Avenue at Walnut 20002 Non injury hit and run.
SBPD Officer was assisting a woman with her injured dog in the 1000 Block of West Valerio.
Suspicious Circumstances in the ICU at Cottage Hospital maybe something to do with a patient and not the hospital.
Parents broke into their Sons apartment and were removing property in the 1600 Block of Mission Drive.
Subject detained at Macys 3805 State street shoplifter they must have some cool stuff they get hit alot.
Minor injury accident Castillo at Islay.

Scanner Reports, Saturday:

Subject disturbing at 351 South Patterson riding a green beach cruiser disturbing employees.
Subject having an anxiety attack with a warrant on top 600 Block of Bradbury, the last people I would call during an anxiety attack are the police especially if I had a warrant.
Check the welfare of a subject down at Nopal and Montecito streets.
CSI Crime Scene Inves at Battys Batting Cages not sure what the crime was but they are across the street from me so posting it. 200 Block of South Milpas.
On a pedestrian Northbound freeway exit at Carrillo.
Female refusing to leave a truck Northbound off-ramp at Turnpike she went to jail.
Subject laying on the railroad tracks at 335 South Milpas refusing to get up they got up with the police got there I wonder what the hell they was thinking they were gonna stop the train and rob it?
415 Domestic on Tiffney Park wife tried to cut Hubbies brake line.
Premise check 125 State street.
242 Investigation at Cottage Hospital victim is a nurse.
Unresponsive female Med Call Samarkand Dining Room.
Premises check Chase Palm Park extension.
Reckless driver in a white Tesla terrorizing a bicyclist in the 700 Block of State street.
I heard on the Amtrak station that a 50 Gallon trash can was hit by a train I did not hear where, as they talk in numbers not actual locations probably somewhere in the county.
Med call for a female down 710 State street.
Fall from a horse with a hip injury 7100 Block of Foxen Canyon.
911 Hang Up 1600 Block of Grand Avenue.
415 Domestic 800 Block of North Salsipeudes.
415 Of sorts unknown type 700 Block of Shoreline.
2 Homeless males disturbing at 605 North Milpas.
242 Assault investigation 900 Block of West Mission.
Missing vehicle 500 Block of Coronel PlaceNon-injury injury hit and run 1000 Block of Cast Village Road.
Missing person report at the police station.
415 Investigation neighbors vs neighbors at the police station.
187 Threats to murder subject motioning with his fingers as if he ha a gun Canon Perdido at Milpas streets.
Child Abuse investigation in the city of Santa Barbara did not hear an address.
484 Theft investigation 600 Block of East Cabrillo

Scanner Reports, Sunday:

Subject disturbing North side of Sears La Cumbre Plaza 3845 State them moved toward Macy’s 3805 State street then left area.
Suspicious circumstances subject possibly riding a stolen bicycle North on Bath from Micheltorena seen by reporting party who suspects the bicycle to be theirs.
Audible Alarm in the 2000 Block of Alisos 459 Alarm motion alarm in the gun room.
Report of a subject hitting them self Highway 101 near Carrillo street homeless subject.
Report of a vehicle fire highway 101 North at Bates fire department was Unable to Locate.
Burglary investigation 400 Block of East Carrillo.
415 Female subject blocking the entrance and yelling at Employees at 219 West Carrillo last seen East Bound on Canon Perdido.
Check the Welfare of a male down near a wheelchair at 7-11 1909 Cliff Drive.
Indecent Exposure 314pc West Beach male in his 50’s.
Beer run El Rancho Market WMA Highway 246.
Med call at the Casino 3400 Block of Mission Drive chest pains.
Homeless woman yelling at passersby outside Our Lady of Sorrows 21 East Sola.
Traumatic Injury Buena Vista Care Center 160 South Patterson.
242 800 Block of Guadalupe.
374 Lizard Draining outside of Amtrak 209 State street WMA in his 50’s.
415 Domestic in the area 600 Block of East Valerio.
CSI at Dargens missed original call don’t know why CSI responded there.
Suspicious circumstances at the California Hotel 36 State street did not say what.
700 Block of San Miguel Med Call.
Check the welfare of a female yelling in the 500 Block of Santa Barbara street.
415 Two Drunk female walking Northbound on State street with a dog making lewd gestures at employees through store windows.
Report of 4 Subjects physically fighting outside Milpas Liquors 314 North Milpas street, funny I never hear of physical fights outside Marijuana Dispensaries.
415 Domestic 1300 Block of Harmon 415 Domestic.
415 Family 400 Block of Foxen Drive.

Will this is kind of a weird day. I had a nightmare last night, though it was an interesting nightmare not that upsetting really, maybe because in the nightmare I was not the victim. I was dating this woman her son was a serial killer he was always walking around with a shovel and drinking vodka. he fed neighborhood dogs hunks of fresh meat. I never ate his cooking his mother said he was a good cook I was afraid to kiss her. I have weird dreams…Will have a great MONday-MONday…Peter, Belinda, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Tom Cat, Clancy, Thomicina, Tiger, Midnight, Merlin, LoLa, PoPo, Fish Head One, and Two, Poncho, Jerry, Walter, Fred, Jonathan, C.J. Brad, Billy, Carl, Kent, Stan, ELMO! Patrick, Christy, Diana, Jim, Rambo, Sherry, David Cox, Poe, Marty, Cop John, Eddie, Bambi, Bengy, Ricky, Bommy, Poppy, June, Muskie, Pat, Mavis, Lafayette, Ted, Magruder, Don, Edwin, Cory, Isabelle, Jerry, Debbie, Ken, LUCY! John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks, Ron Santo, Tom Petty, and Chris willing we will see you on Humpy Day. Later, Roger