Scanner Reports 7-10-19

Reads 2189


By Roger the Scanner Guy

The Santa Barbara Architectural Board of Review has voted 5-0 on fixing up the Milpas Shoplifting Center at 29 South Milpas, where the Sprouts Grocery Store is going in. Just a couple improvements: Copper Gutters, New Landscaping, more lighting, Queen Palms, etc. There is more but I just mentioned a couple that will be nice, I guess. I like the old trees but they never seem to get a chance anywhere when it comes to Shopping Centers. There is always change to make things look better. That is the way business is, if you want to stay in business everything has to look good. I wonder if the roundabout is going to get a new look too because the last time I walked passed there (Monday) there was a big pile of what looked like luggage, or personal items in the center of the roundabout and the roundabout itself kinda looked crappy. I mean this is a "Gateway," there is also the surrounding area of the Shopping center to think of. You don't want tourists walking from their beautiful beach hotels seeing a big pile of someones personal items sitting in the middle of the Roundabout in a GateWay to the City of Santa Barbara the American Riviera.

Speaking of Piles I have noticed several piles recently in the Blessed Milpas UNDERPANTS.  There was a huge pile of barf in the there other day, there were a few piles of poop in there not too long ago but it's all flat now. I would think tourists walking through the MILPAS UNDERPANTS on their way to Sprouts Grocery Store might lose their appetites walking just from the sights and the smells. I do hope that someone is going to be assigned to clean up that area, it will make the Shopping Center look so much better, a good bleaching of the UNDERPANTS  every couple of weeks will give it a good fresh smell too. Lettuce not forget the on and off ramps of Highway 101 to Milpas street, that whole area should be cleaned up to make the Shopping Center look good, it's good business.

I got yelled at walking in my MILPAS UNDERPANTS yesterday, not sure why and couldn't tell what one guy was yelling but he was looking at me so I naturally assumed he was yelling at me, he was Growling too/ I just kept walking another guy said, "I  would like to have a walking stick like that." I said they cost money, he too Growled after I said that they must be serving up indigestion at the shelters lately. I love my walking stick it helps me walk better than with a cane. With a cane I have to bend and that hurts my back which really has been hurting lately especially after that pair of earthquakes. I can barely move now it sucks too cause I have to go see the doctor. I should walk up to someone with a Tesla and say "I would like to have a Tesla like that" then growl at them and see what happens. I saw a Tesla on MONday by Tina's Nail Salon it was beautiful, I was checking it out looking inside it was blue with white interior a beautiful car. I was kind of afraid the cops might show up, I hear calls like that all the time people looking in cars it's considered suspicious looking in cars, I look in cars all the time I hope I don't get caught... Anyway That's my MILPAS UNDERPANTS AND I'm sticking to them, Spouts Grocery Store will be sticking to them too if the surrounding area continues to look like Crap....HERE IS YOUR SCANNER REPORTS.

Scanner Reports, Monday

  • Vegetarian Fire in the Riverbed at Quail Court in Fillmore.
  • 20002pc Non injury hit and run in the 1900 Block of Cliff Drive.
  • Vandalism in the city parking structure in the 900 Block of Anacapa street.
  • Found property 105 East Anapamu.
  • 415pc Over a stolen wallet at McDonalds did not say which one but I think it was the one at 29 North Milpas.
  • 415pc In the  police station lobby over money.
  • Six males 242ed Assaulted one male in the 600 Block of West Micheltorena.
  • Med Call rear of the county jail head injury.
  • Possible Stalker with an order to stay away is back at a residence on the East Side somewheres.
  • Med call fall victim head injury at the Airport 500 Fowler Road.
  • SBPD checking out an occupied vehicle at Dwight Murphy Park.
  • Behind the gas station at Castillo and Carrillo is an old white Ford pick up truck with an older male doing drugs.
  • Juvenile problem with parent in the office at SBHS 700 Block of East Anapamu runaway.
  • Suspicious Male Quinientos at Milpas Male acting weird walking in the street BMA wearing a blue shirt and shorts.
  • Premises check McKenzie Park.
  • Med call foot injury, Amtrak
  • Threats investigation 2000 Block of Edgewater.
  • 415pc Between 2 neighbors in the 1100 Block of DLV.
  • Cool Dude smoking marijuana on the Micheltorena Overcrossing shirtless and making rude comments to females.
  • Reporting Party concerned that a WMA in his 30's with a red jeep has been camping in La Mesa Park for several months.
  • Premises check Oak Park.
  • Possible injury accident involving an elderly female in the center divider at  Constance and State street.
  • in the 1100 Block of East Montecito sometype of 415pc Domestic a male shoving a female with an infant in her arms, then trying to take the child from her of course he left before police responded.
  • 459pc Burglary suspects 4 HMA's all wearing hats in their 30's left in a black BMW SUV no license plates the 6800 Block of Shadowbrook.
  • A dozen juveniles hanging out on the Cacique foot bridge 1200 Block of Cacique
  • Several juveniles on the Roof of La Cumbre Jr. Highs gym
  • 242 Assault investigation at Cottage Hospital.

Scanner Reports, Tuesday:

  • Male down in the roadway 2000 Block of Edgewater thought to be a possible public accident the male was code blue Engine 6 Medics, SBPD responded patient was transported to Cottage 2 dogs that were with the man transported by Animal Control, Sad.
  • Oak Cottages 1800 Block of DLV Patient refusing to take his medication acting aggressive toward staff, had 242ed Assaulted a staff member before, SBPD response.
  • Vehicle vs guard rail Highway 101 Southbound just North of Los Positas.
  • Green Tent reported as a Hazard to beachgoers at Cabrillo and Milpas on the beach.
  • Parking violation 100 Block of East Los Olivos.
  • Oversized vehicle parking violation 900 Block of Portsuello.
  • Premises check Animal Control 3  Cabrillo Ball Field
  • Theft investigation 1000 Block of CVR.
  • Gas odor in and out of a res in the 2300 Block of Cliff Drive.
  • Check with Welfare of a drunk male with a 2 year old male in Vera Cruz Park with a group of transients.
  • 242 Assault of reporting party and dog 100 Block of West Yanonali after being confronted in a garage HMA long hair backpack.
  • Squatter 200 Block of East Anapamu HMA found sleeping in a vacant residence.
  • Med call for a subject down near Big 5 Sporting Goods in the 3900 Block of State street.
  • Suspicious circumstances possible prowling 200 Block of West DLG.
  • Rollover traffic accident female in a white Jeep 23 South Hope unknown if injury don't think so.
  • Traffic Accident vehicle into a tree UCSB Anacapa Dorms
  • Premises check Dwight Murphy Park.
  • 415pc Subject refusing to leave The Pizza Kitchen 700 Block of Chapala.
  • Probation Check 600 Block of Wentworth.
  • Unresponsive female in front of Taco Bell 1000 Block of Casitas Pass.


Will dat is all outta me for now Have a Wonderful WEDnesday...Peter, Molly, Belinda, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Midnight, Merlin, Shadow, FREDDIE!, Maxwell, Lola, PoPo, Tom Cat, Clancy, Tomicina, Tiger, Tiny, Andy, Fish Heads One, and Two, Poncho, Denny, Jerry, Walter, Fred, Jonathan, C.J., Brad, Billy, Carl, Stan, Kent, ELMO, Patrick, Christy, Diana, Jim, Rambo, Sherry, Bommy, Poppy, June, Muskie, David Cox, Po, Marty, Cop John, Eddie, Bambi, Bengie, Ricky, Willie, Mark, Lafayette, Ted, Magruder, Don, Edwin, Cory, Crazy Ed, Pat, Mavis, Mrs. MacArthur, Debbie, Ken, Isabelle, Jerry, LUCY! STOBIE THE HOBO, Ross, John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, John Havlick, Ernie Banks, Ron Santo, Tom Petty, and Chris willing we will see you on FRYday.  Later,  Roger

Login to add Comments


Show Comments
Roger Jul 11, 2019 09:35 AM
Scanner Reports 7-10-19

Oh look the cry babies are down voting us they must be jealous...

Roger Jul 11, 2019 08:48 AM
Scanner Reports 7-10-19

I put a few skid marks there myself when I had my station wagon scared the poop out of people driving those little cars sure would love to get another Coupe De Ville.. No vitimans yet were on them for some time but quit after losing my gal. May get back on them again someday.

Phantom Blot Jul 11, 2019 08:42 AM
Scanner Reports 7-10-19

Any day now we should see an ad in the City classifieds for a Milpas/Cacique Street Underpass Sanitizer position. They will need a Class 1 drivers license to operate a city water truck with a high pressure hose and 50% chlorine in the tank. The job could include the Roundabout tire marks that I enjoy putting there.

Phantom Blot Jul 11, 2019 08:34 AM
Scanner Reports 7-10-19

Are you taking daily glucosamine/chondrotin and also calcium for that skeleton your are walking around in? I have found them to be very beneficial to the health of my aging bones and joints. Nobody wins the war with gravity, and gravity seems to have even more pressure wherever you are. (Snarf!) Costco has been the least expensive place to purchase them, online or in the store. I can feel the effects of the g/c after a couple of weeks, and vice versa when I forget to take it daily. Let me know if you start to win over gravity and I will call NASA and/or County Mental Health.

Please Login or Register to comment on this.