Scanner Reports 10-16-17

Well I did it now, I really screwed up. Out of the little goodness in my heart, I bought a woman flowers. Just being friendly, and her being from the old country and all, but buying flowers for a woman there has different meanings. I didn’t know that, plus there is a language barrier and I don’t like hurting people’s feelings. So now my neighbor’s grandmother is smiling at me all the time and I’m always trying to hide. Kinda like when the police are looking for you; you know that sooner or later they are going to capture you, but you hide anyway. I think I’d like it better if the police were after me. Jail seems like a very safe place right now, I’m scared. I told my Mommy about it and she laughed. At least it gave her something to laugh about. The other night I was walking around and came around a corner and ran right into Grandma. She giggled like a younger woman and I wished I was drunk on my ass far, far away. Maybe I’ll jump off the wagon on my way to the wedding and take a little trip. Marriage is not in my blood. I’ve been institutionalized once I don’t want to go back.

The other day I bought beautiful Sunflowers, and they are here with me in my apartment no one’s getting them. They are with my Belinda. It’s funny because I sure did not expect this woman to act this way. I was just trying to be friendly, but not that friendly.

Here is your Scanner Reports, Friday:

• SBPD premise check 200 block of Palm Ave.
• Check the welfare of a subject laying in the sand just east of Stearns Wharf.
• Check the welfare of a male sleeping on a ramp in the 500 block of Anacapa.
• Hit and run with injuries, 2900 block of Betteravia in Santa Maria.
• Premises check PATH 816 Cacique Street.
• Premises check 100 block of West Cabrillo.
• Drunk driver in the DMV parking lot passed out.
• Suspicious circumstances, male put a knife in a recycling bin in the 1800 block of San Pasqual.
• Theft investigation, 300 block of East Carrillo.
• Non injury hit and run on State Street from Islay, a white male adult in a green SUV.
• Felony hit and run investigation Cottage Hospital left leg injury.
• Non injury hit and run, 600 Block of Fremont Place.
• Stolen auto, 100 block of Castillo.
• Theft investigation 7-11 1900 block of State Street, WMA wearing pink golf shirt in his 70’s, took unknown items.
• Minor injury accident, 424 North Milpas, Range Rover vs Camry.
• Assault investigation at Cottage Hospital.
• Medical emergency behind the MTD station, diabetic problems.
• AMR transport, Marian to County PHF.
• Motel 6 near the beach, male had female in a headlock. Might have been trying to pick up an under aged girl near Tri County Produce earlier. BMA with a black Lexus.
• 2900 block of Mission Drive, overdose.
• Medical call for a disoriented subject, 2225 DLV.
• Fight, two transients in the street, State and Ortega.
• Medical call, 35 South Milpas.
• Wires down, 6700 block of Del Playa.
• Felony hit and run, Alamo Pintado, 1900 block. Suspect vehicle a black Chevy Venture missing a mirror.
• Medical call ill subject 4000 Via Lucero.
• Suspicious circumstances in the 200 block of Reef Court.
• Check the welfare of a female who was standing in the street, Cliff at La Marina.
• Family disturbance, 100 block of North Hope.
• Non injury accident in front of the Bank of America at Hope and State Street.
• Trespasser refusing to leave the boat dock at Lake Cachuma.
• Medical call, 700 block of East Cota.
• Structure fire the 76 Station, 200 South Milpas. Light smoke in the building, Engine Two and Truck One handled it.
• Drunk in the 800 block of Olive.
• Overdose in a vehicle, East Beach Bath House, 1118 East Cabrillo.

Scanner Reports, Saturday:

• Premises check Cabrillo Bath House.
• Medical call head injury, PD on scene, 400 block of West Pine.
• Medical call, 3200 block of Foothill.
• State and Cabrillo, man down, medical call.
• Highway 101 northbound on ramp at Milpas, premises check.
• Medical call for an ill male inside Tina’s Nail Salon, 201 South Milpas.
• Neighbors not getting along at the Faulding Hotel.
• Garden at Carrillo, traffic accident non injury.
• Suspicious vehicle parked in the handicapped space at the MOXI, 125 State Street. Tinted windows, black SUV, no handicapped placard.
• Three gunshots heard in the 200 block of Garden Gate Lane.
• Structure fire, shed, Highway 246 at Riverview.
• Medical call, unknown type, 130 Harbor Way.
• Theft of a cell phone on Glenbrook.
• Roommates not getting along in the 300 block of West Pedregosa.
• Check the welfare of a disoriented female in the reporting party’s house, 600 block of East Montecito.
• Illegal vendors near Turnpike and Hollister.
• BOLO, silver Camaro doing donuts in Tri -County Produce lot.
• Suspicious circumstances, 3700 block of State Street.
• Subject refusing to leave USA Gas in the 100 block of Highway 246.
• On San Roque Road near the reservoir, a fridge in the middle of the road.
• 300 block of Orcutt Road, assault.
• BOLO for nails in the roadway, exit and enter Santa Barbara Police Station.
• Male assaulted female in the 200 block of East Cabrillo.
• Theft of a wallet, 1200 block of Bath Street.
• Fall victim, SBPD on scene, near the Big and Tall store in Loreto Plaza.

Scanner Reports, Sunday:

• Head laceration, medical call Santa Barbara Ro Co 321 Motor Way SBPD on scene.
• Withdrawals, possible overdose, medical call, CVS Pharmacy, 300 block of North Milpas.
• Area check for fireworks, Coronado at Daytona, Goleta.
• 100 block of Los Aquaries, domestic.
• Motorcyclist down, Highway 101 southbound just south of Highway 154 in Buellton. This is sad – two fatalities.
• Fall victim in front of Joes Café, 500 block of State Street.
• Domestic dispute, sister threw property, not hers, out and left, 4000 block of Via Lucero.
• Stolen auto, 300 block of South Voluntario.
• Fire reported out, 514 West Pueblo.
• Family domestic, woman screaming, 1700 block of Santa Barbara Street.
• Burglary, 514 West Pueblo. I’m sure there is a story behind a fire reported out and a burglary at the same address, but I don’t know what it is.
• Father/son, verbal dispute in front of Whole Foods, 3700 block of State Street.
• Man down West El Camino at Thornberg.
• Audible alarm in the 4000 block of South Bradley.
• Burglary to a vehicle, Brown Road at Alisal at the Point Sal Trail. Suspect vehicle, a silver Saturn with 2 souls on board.
• An idiot robbed a Goleta gas station clerk for a pack of Winston lights, got caught and went to jail. Dumb ass.
• Keep the Peace on Ocean View, reporting party there to pick up property at a residence.
• A woman in the main lobby of the Santa Barbara County Jail had a felony warrant with no bail. So instead of visiting someone in the County Jail, she is now an inmate at the County Jail.
• Broken water pipe in the 1200 block of DLV.
• 1800 block of Loma Street, husband who has been drinking threw his wife to the ground and tried to choke her, Domestic Violence.
• Woman in a grey Dodge Charger with lots of tattoo’s yelled racial slurs at a woman and her elderly mother in the 1500 block of San Andres, Foodland parking lot.

Well that is all outta me for now. Have a Wonderful Monday. Belinda, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Fish Head One, Clancy, Poncho, Jerry, Walter, Fred,  Brad, Billy, Jonathan, C.J., Carl, Stan, Kent, ELMO, Patrick, Christy, Rambo, Sherry, Magruder, Edwin, Don, Cory, Diana, Jim, Marty, Cop John, Isabelle, Jerry, John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks, and Chris willing, we will see you on Wednesday. Later, Roger