My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

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Dear Edda,

My girlfriend’s cat doesn’t like me.  I’m not much of a cat person, but I’m really trying my best.  Whenever I go over there, the cat jumps out from behind the door or something, and bats at my feet. My girlfriend says this means she is trying to scare me away.  When I sit down, the cat sits in my lap and lets me scratch her ears. She even makes a purring sound.  My girlfriend says she is being dominant and trying to keep me in one spot. 

After we go out for dinner, I am not allowed to come into the house because it will upset the cat and keep her up all night. My girlfriend says I will never be able to spend the night there.  I have tried bringing treats and toys, but my girlfriend takes them away and says that they are not good for the cat.

Like I said, I am trying my best to make friends with the cat, but nothing seems to work.  What should I do?

Wannabe Cat Lover

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Dear Wannabe,

I’m not sure how to say this nicely, but it sounds to me like it’s not the cat who doesn’t like you. Consider getting a dog and moving on.


Edda is not a medical professional but a local lady who loves to give out advice, even when it's not asked of her. Submit your question to for Edda to answer.

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REX OF SB Sep 19, 2020 04:44 PM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

Dear Wannabe,

I'll bet that cat is a familiar—a supernatural being that assists witches in their magical practices. Pyewacket, the cat in "Bell, Book and Candle," was a familiar. And from what you say about the girlfriend, she really DOES sound like a witch. Throw a bucket of water on both of them and see if they melt.

Glad I could help.

JustAguy Sep 19, 2020 05:23 PM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

I think Edda is right. If she were really into you she would look for ways to bridge the gap between you and the pet. Lose the girl but, please be kind to cats.

CoastWatch Sep 19, 2020 06:23 PM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

Move on- there are plenty of normal-loving women without CATS--- Find a gal with a DOG- she will be a more balanced person!

Minibeast Sep 19, 2020 06:50 PM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

Dogs, cats, fish. This reminds me of when my closest female friend used to come talk to me about her "conquests" back in the 80s. (Decades before everyone and his dog had a dog.) One night, she met a guy and went back to his place with him. The sex was great. However, my friend "took exception" to the guy's dog being up on the bed (post coitus). This woman made a couple of remarks something along the lines of " it's me or the dog" and the guy couldn't show her the door fast enough. "Love me, love my dog" is not just a proverb. It is beyond dispute. +++++++++++ In your particular case, however, despite your best efforts, and time ----and money ---- spent on your "girlfriend" ( unadulterated wishful thinking, on your part) and her cat, that chick really doesn't give a flyin' hoot about you. The cat doesn't have a problem with you, but her owner sure does. You don't have a whisker of a chance at making this relationship work. Here's another cliché for you: "There's plenty of fish in the sea."

ParvoPup Sep 19, 2020 07:28 PM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

Next time you make a tuna fish sandwich - dab a little of the liquid on your legs - the cat will change it's mind.

Andrea Smith Sep 19, 2020 08:43 PM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

Not only does it sound like your GF knows little about cats, sounds like you'd be better off without her. So would the cat probably, too.

REX OF SB Sep 19, 2020 10:08 PM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

Oh yeah, I forgot to add this — the cat really is trying to kill you. Cats are like that. Really. They are.

greytfull Sep 20, 2020 08:21 AM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

I've had, and loved, cats and dogs all my life.
Cats are delightful, mischievous characters.
What Edda & minibeast say is absolutely correct, so reexamine why you are attracted to this particular girl. So many pets lose their homes when it becomes a choice between them and a
(temporary) boyfriend or girlfriend. These people should never have had pets in the first place.
You don't want the karma of an animal losing it's home (and perhaps it's life) because of you.
This girl is doing you a favor by showing you her nature up front.

d8vanilla Sep 20, 2020 08:37 AM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

There is always a solution to a problem, you just gotta think of it.... Edda doesn't seem to have a clue about animals or relationships, or about finding the solution, so i would recommend talking with somebody else. (unless this post is supposed to be a big joke).

notme Sep 20, 2020 09:29 AM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

Fake or not, a cat that doesn't like you would not sit in your lap and purr. Lose the girlfriend and get your own cat.

pstarSR Sep 20, 2020 10:27 AM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

wow, really? had to post to the internet to ask what was up? I think there was a mistake in the first sentence "my girlfriend". If you cant go back to her place after dinner, and the cat is more important to her emotional wellbeing. she aint your girlfriend. this has to be fake

PitMix Sep 21, 2020 07:38 AM
My Girlfriend's Cat Doesn't Like Me

People are taking Edda way too seriously. Not every topic has to be a national crisis, we have plenty of those. I'm okay with her answering questions that are not accompanied by a certificate of authenticity.

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