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Scanner Reports 7-31-12
updated: Jul 30, 2012, 7:00 AM
By Roger the Scanner Guy
Monday-Monday. I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. I was making Supper for me and Belinda FRYday Evening when an unannounced FIEND showed up Drunker than a SKUNK. I usually don't mind but this guy really irritated me. Still I kept my cool. I pretty much just had enough for me and her so he wasn't getting part of the main course Salmon, still he kept hinting....WOODCHIPPER ALERT! I don't have a regular kitchen. No burners or oven. I have a microwave, crockpot, steamer, and electric frying pan which are all I need, I can cook. He was amazed at all the electric appliances and especially loved the sugar snap peas slowly cooking in the fryer so much that when I wasn't paying attention he slipped in the mayo and hot sauce. Carefully he separated the peas while they were cooking then as they were still slowly frying began to eat right out of the frying pan. Some of the food was falling out of his drunkin mouth back into my frying pan it was pretty gross. Every time the scanner would erupt with law enforcement transmissions he would stop eating and look at all the scanners and my computer as if they violated his presence. Then he would announce to no one in particular "You know all this!? I do not approve", shaking his head No I don't! "This Scanner thing you do...? I do not approve, no I don't." Over and over again. Belinda came over and made a plate skipping the peas some which were splattered down the drunken Casanova's shirt as he tried to flirt with her. She was wearing a Taft California Fire Department official t-shirt which somewhat intimidated him. "I don't approve of all this Scanner stuff you do." He said again as if he was trying to impress her. She kinda grunted at him and left. "She is a Fireman from Taft California," He said, shocked look on his face. I was thinking of yanking his head out of its socket at that point and twisting it around some. He must have been able to read my mind because he beat feet the HELL outta my place. I am not a violent man anymore but sometimes I still entertain the thoughts.
Like my thought of using a WOODCHIPPER on sex offenders and other criminals who choose to violate people in violent and painful ways. I guess it's like meditation to me having been put through some of their pain the thought of their worthless carcass going through a WOODCHIPPER sooths my inner BEAST, so to speak. I'm sorry for those who can't relate. At the same time grateful most of you don't know what it's like to go through something like that. Your life would have been ruined more than likely. Mine was, for many years the anger from living through a childhood with physical, mental, and sexual abuse screwed me up for a long time. I went through a lot of therapy. One therapist helped me but I wasn't cured just better able to deal with life. I joined the military twice, got thrown out twice. Drank a lot of booze behind it trying to self-medicate. The booze helped me beat the HELL out of a couple deserving souls. It wasn't too long after I quit drinking the last time the anger started to calm a bit, and the violent thoughts left me. Humor started to creep back into my life.
I find the WOODCHIPPER to be a humorous way of dealing with scum bags that deserve a ride through one. Child molesters deserve a ride thru Roger's WOODCHIPPER. Afterwards the results can be sold as buckets as CHUM, you see everyone serves a purpose in this world.
Hair is Your Scanner Reports, FRYday:
Assist the Fire Department with an uncooperative patient at the Cacique Street Shelter.
1145 Suicidal subject in a residence on East Victoria.
Police out there serving warrants for dinner at various addresses in the city.
415 Transient disturbing 1100 Block of DLV.
415 Fight at the dollar store in the 200 Block of North Milpas.
Reckless Drivers 3 Dark BMWs racing from the Boathouse near Hendry's Beach into Hope Ranch.
South San Marcos at Rose juveniles pouring gasoline into bottles and lighting it on fire.
Garden at Arrellaga traffic accident minor injuries.
Report of 4 juveniles fighting Nopal at Canon Perdido one had a brick. When police arrived they were unable to locate the young'uns.
459 To a residence in the 200 Block of East Figueroa not too far from the police department.
Report that subject fell off the cliffs in Summerland. I heard no more over the scanner about that.
Scanner Reports, Saturday:
Bright and Early caught a client of the Cacique Street Shelter urinating in my driveway.
Medical Emergency Cacique Street Shelter hand laceration.
Mesa at Edgewater fall victim head injury.
Bath at Arrellaga code 40 DRUNK female down.
Check the Welfare of two children in the 400 Block of West Valerio sounded like some type of custody dispute.
594 Vandalism investigation graffiti Stevens Park.
Engine 2 went on a call in the 800 Block of Bond Ave had a problem with the patient code 40 DRUNK police arrived and took him away.
On Highway 166 female in grey Mazda took pills was attempting to suicide. I guess by going for a drive she wanted to share the experience with others they found her pretty quick.
Medical Emergency at the Greek Festival medical tent for difficulty breathing.
200 Block of Remedio Road elder fall victim head injury.
Highway 101 just North of Mariposa Reina small silver SUV on the side of the road with a subject lying next to it.
I missed the location but it was in the County someone was trying to stop a wedding.
Annoying vehicle alarm from a silver Mercedes going off several days in the 400 Block of East Pedregosa.
Assault Victim down on the ground 501 State street, suspect black male adult wearing a green shirt walking North on State street.
Hit and Run near foot of Stearns Wharf 20001 with injury but victim declined medics involving a grey Lexus parked on the wharf.
Injury traffic accident involving a bicyclist Pueblo at Calle Real.
Elder Abuse in the County.
800 Block of East Cabrillo 10851 Investigation stolen auto.
594 Vandalism Graffiti spray paint on Garden Street.
242 Assault investigation at the Cacique Street Shelter.
Illegal Burn charcoal smoldering left on sidewalk in the middle of Alameda Park 200 Block of East Sola.
Code 40 Female with a traffic cone on her head entered the Harbor Restaurant on the wharf and started breaking glasses she went to jail.
242 Assault Suspect choked reporting party was last seen South on Anacapa 55-60 years old wearing a black jacket riding a yellow bicycle.
Loud Potty in the 500 Block of West Canon Perdido.
Subject refusing to leave Starbucks 500 Block of State Street.
415 Domestic Son yelling at Mother 1400 Block of Lou Dillon.
Unknown 415 male subject near a Volvo yelling obscenities near Hughes Auto on Hitchcock.
Check the Welfare of a female down in the 900 Block of DLV.
Scanner Reports, Sunday:
459 To a vehicle in the 4600 Block of Foothill.
Traffic Accident fall from a bicycle Alisos at Quinientos turned out to be a drunken idiot on a bicycle putting everyone at risk, WOODCHIPPER!
Code Blue on the running trail between the Airport and Goleta Beach. Heard he was bought back hope he stays that way.
2500 Block of Crescent 10851 Investigation Auto Theft.
Report of 415 Fight at Nordstrom's two security guards attempting to handcuff a 484 theft suspect.
Fight Brewing USA Gas 340 West Carrillo between two white male adults one in his 20's the otter in his 50's.
Highway 101 Northbound at Santa Monica motorcyclist down in roadway, unknown extent of injuries.
Carjacking in Lompoc white Ford Explorer 1998 Vehicle plate 6LAB066, 6 black male adults with a baseball bat. Few moments later it was a black female driver and two black male adults were left I guess the rest got dropped off.
Suspicious subject on Cold Springs Bridge black male adult wearing a red sweatshirt seems unstable.
Santa Barbara and Cota streets 10851 Recovered stolen auto.
2 Code 40 Drunks passed out on the Cacique foot bridge reporting party is concerned they might fall into the creek.
Keep the Peace in the 1200 Block of East Yananoli reporting party has traced her stolen cell phone to an address in that block.
Check the Welfare of a transient down in the 100 Block of West Figueroa.
Death Investigation 3775 Modoc Road Vista Del Monte.
415 Fight four or five subjects Anapamu and San Andreas possible knife involved moved down to Carrillo then broke up witnesses couldn't say for sure who had the knife so they were filed and released.
Check the Welfare of two dogs in a silver Mercedes in the parking lot of 610 State Street.
2700 Block of Los Positas Bicyclist Down injured transported to Cottage Engine 4 following.
Report of Suicidal Subject Cota and Quarantina covered in blood trying to bite his wrist. Patient walked away Police and Fire located in front of Fresh and Easy Milpas and Gutierrez one witness said the subject was biting himself.
Well, that is all outta me. I hope you all have a wonderful Monday and Dog Willing We will see you on Wednesday, the first Hump Day of the Month. Roger
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