Yes. The Ronald Reagan Museum. Check it out, I bought pencils, postcards, and because it was only $2.50, a beribboned copy of the Declaration of Independence. Makes for fascinating reading. You can also buy Christmas ornaments with pictures of our former President on them. Is that weird? People were buying them, so I guess not.

We started off with a six minute film in one of the many theaters in the museum. A more gorgeous piece of propaganda I have never seen. By the end I was almost in tears. Ronnie sounded so good when he was speaking. I wanted to run back to the gift store and buy a rhinestone flag pin to wear.

The museum and tour (at least the one we 'self-guided') was broken down into three parts:

* Nancy Reagan, First Lady, Lots Of Her Nice Clothes
* Life Back Then, Much Cooler And Photogenic
* Oh My God, Look At The Giant Plane

Being First Lady is an very stressful and strange job. You must be dressed to the nines at all times, throw parties and teas and state dinners and focus on keeping kids off of drugs. It takes lots of outfits and jewelry. Also, designers who can make you look fantastic. And it worked out very well for Nancy. See?

This is gorgeous. You would not believe how tiny the waist was. Also, that skirt? All silk. And the beading on the bodice? Unbelievably intricate and surely expensive. I wish I could wear dresses with bows on the shoulder.

You know what really accentuates a tiny waist? A nicely done belt buckle. The sleeves on this number are so cute.

And when you're in the mood for plaid AND fringe? How about this? This must have weighed 15 pounds. All wool.

This was labeled "Black Restaurant Dress". Is that a title or a style? I couldn't tell, but I would totally wear that to eat in a restaurant. Preferably a sushi restaurant.

Too restrained for you? Do you want something more regal? More ornate? How about this? Oh my, the buttons, the frilled cuffs, the embroidery.

Are you tired of dresses? Ok, one more. This was my favorite dress mostly because it reminded me of one of my favorite prom dresses off all time. It was pink and I got to wear a petticoat and it had puffed sleeves the size of my head. The skirt had two layers that curtained back, just like Cinderella's. I believe there were some roses and bows on it too.

Onto the old-timey days part of the tour. You can tell it's old-timey because of the cool old-timey sign you have to pass under to get there.

Why are we back in the old days? Oh, that's right. Ronald Reagan had another job before he got into politics.

But he became Governor of the State of California, and if the film they showed us beforehand is correct, he voted in a charming booth just like this.

And later on, when he threw in his name for President, they tallied up the votes at the convention on this old-timey machine. Quaint, eh?

When he was at the White House, telephone operators manned a board just like this. Actually, this very one (I guess you can take some things with you when you leave office). You can't see them in the photograph but there are little labels above each hole, "Lincoln Bedroom", "Study Number Two", etc.

Some of us liked hanging out in the old-timey part of the museum, but there were others determined to see a big shiny plane.

Before you can see the big shiny plane (ok, ok, it's called Air Force One) you watch another film, this one about Air Force One and narrated by Jimmy Stewart. In the corner of the Air Force One theater is a real podium from the White House and you can stand up there and pretend you are giving a speech or refusing to take questions from the press. It was a photo op magnet, everyone wanted to stand behind the podium and have their picture taken. This old couple was so charming; she was being Nancy, gazing adoringly at her Ronnie, while he was looking avuncular and statesman-like.

Can we see the plane NOW? No, not yet. Before you can see the plane, you have to pass by one last checkpoint. This is so you remember that Reagan ended the Cold War.

Now you can start to see the plane. Wow, it looks.......wow………how big is this thing?

That's the real thing right? Not a model? Sheesh, it's gigantic. But so shiny!

The Air Force One exhibit hall is a master of design and multi-tiered floor plans.

Your first glimpse of AF1 is the nose, pressed right up against a hangar wall of glass, looking over the dry hills of Simi Valley. It's a spectacular view. As you circle around the first level you are led onto a red carpet that takes you right up to the front door of the plane. Yes, you are really allowed to stand on a red carpet, climb a few stairs, and have your picture taken right in front of the open plane door. This way you can pretend you are the President and wave at the line of people who are patiently waiting for you to have your picture taken so that they can have their turn.

You can't take your own picture though. It's like Disneyland - there are museum employees who will take a professional digital picture for you and then sell it to you on the third level at a kiosk next to the Big Shiny Air Force One gift shop. (Which we did of course. How often do you get to stand at the open door of Air Force One and wave at a nonexistent crowd?

While I was standing on the red carpet, waiting my turn in line, I got into trouble. This happens to me more and more. I try to discreetly take a photograph and am caught by The Man. Remember what happened when I tried that in Superior Court?

I have not done the actual tour of the interior of Air Force One justice. It was phenomenal. I'm not a big admirer of aircraft except how it keeps me in the air without crashing. But being able to peek into the pilot's compartment was so very cool. So many switches and dials, how do they keep them all straight? And how do they fit four grown people into a cockpit the size of my desk?

You get to see Reagan's onboard office, Nancy's dressing room/office, the galley, where the Secret Service guys sit, where the staff sits, and where the press sits - at the back of the plane.

Oh, I almost forgot to tell you about the portable nuclear communications bunker (because they certainly won't let you take any photos of it) which consists of a giant array of machines and communication equipment crammed into one side of the plane, complete with red phones and nuclear code breakers. Ok, I'm guessing at the nuclear code breakers, but there were some ominous looking binders there. This is the one part of Air Force One that is glassed off, not merely roped off. Do not even think of trying to touch the glass.

You exit onto the lowest level, right by the gift shop. There were lots of old men in this gift store, buying model planes and caps with pictures of AF1 embroidered on the front. Now you can stare straight up into the belly of the plane. This will make you feel very small and maybe a little nervous; because I'm sure they tested the ropes and cable that support the plane over and over. Right?

There were other big machines to see, the Marine One helicopter, some old-timey cop cars, and old-timey limos with bulletproof windows but we were fading quickly and had to be rushed out of the library and driven immediately to Carrillo's Mexican Deli in Simi Valley for lunch. They make their own tortillas there and oh my, they are delicious. Some carnitas, some tomatoes and cilantro, and yes, cheese please. Cheese in and on my cheese enchilada and on my rice and guacamole!

There is no picture of the food at lunch because it was demolished in record time.

And lastly, there are jars and jars of jelly beans -- well, Jelly Bellies, to be accurate, everywhere in the museum. There are jars on desks, cupboards, tables, and probably a dozen just on Air Force One alone. Our tour guide told us that once it was made known that Reagan loved jelly beans that children would send him jelly beans as gifts.

Hey, look, I got a gift too! Some reader remembered that I love Froot Loops!

Now I think I'll tell people I like money too, so they can send me some.

I strive to be what it says on the red pencils you can buy in the museum gift shop, "First Lady."