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Scanner Reports 1-16-12
updated: Jan 16, 2012, 7:00 AM
By Roger the Scanner Guy
My Dear Sweet Mother wants me to write a letter to the editor of our hometown paper about the rights of smokers, and how they should have the right to smoke inside restaurants and bars. She was really laying it on thick about how she has never asked me for anything. How I am her son she loves me, how proud of me she is. "By golly" she says, "I have smoked since the age of 15 and have never gotten sick because of it - no emphysema, or COPD." I guess she forgot that little bout of cancer she had 30 years ago. "I've always been there for you no matter what."
That was good, whenever she says that to me I remember the time she and her boyfriend said they were taking me out to a nice restaurant up in Des Planes - John Wayne Gacy country. He was a city councilman and a serial killer. Anyway they said they were taking me to a restaurant, but it was a psychiatric hospital. They grabbed me, shoved me thru the back door and ran away; the place did have good food though. I had a little anger problem and probably needed help but not in that way. I look back at it now in a humorous way. I think it's especially funny thinking that just about any rights I had at all were stripped from me when I was shoved through that door. Rights, and now my mother wants me to defend what she claims is her right to smoke inside a restaurant. She almost had me... Mothers are good con artists.
I believe that as long as no one is getting hurt or violated in any way it's OK whatever it is within strict limits. I smoked cigarettes 33 years off and on, mostly on. I quit smoking cigarettes almost 8 years ago and now I'm allergic to cigarette smoke. It really bothers me. I have friends that still smoke but they respect me and don't do it in my home. I would not go to a restaurant that allowed smoking. "Nice try Mom, but there is a really nice restaurant I'd like to take you to mommy dearest." My Uncle writes commentaries and he told her he was going to write one defending her right to smoke in a restaurant, but he never did. Hee, hee, hee…
"WATCH OUT EDHAT COMMUNITY ROGER JUST SAID HE WAS IN A PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL GET A CLUE HE'S NUTS..." I just wrote that about myself, maybe THEY are right. Oh Well time for another Prozac what else is nude? Crime is up, the Rich are getting Richer, and the Poor are getting Poorer.
Hair is your Scanner Reports, FRYday:
Sola and Olive non injury Traffic accident involving ped and vehicle.
Transient down in the Milpas Underpants.
WMA Yelling at children at Kids World.
800 Block of North Voluntario check the welfare of a disoriented female.
10-15 Transients harassing passersby on State Street.
On More Mesa main path to the beach a naked male is walking around.
Garden at Gutierrez 23152 Black Porsche female passing out behind the wheel.
Elderly male yelling for help from his apartment on Ocean View
1144 Death mid-town Santa Barbara in a residence
300 Block of North Soledad SBPD seeking wanted subject.
SBPD had a Check the Welfare call at Figueroa near State Street the subject had warrants over 50,000.00 worth.
484 in Custody at Rite Aid, shoplifter.
1100 Block of North Nopal 10 HMAs fighting on the sidewalk they were gone when police got there.
100 Block of East Mission subject with warrants.
415 involving 2 or 3 males verbal 700 Block of State Street call holding an hour or so.
3 or 4 transients harassing passersby parking lot 3
Shoplifter at Gelson's assaulted employee while escaping attempted to run another employee over. He got away for a while but was pegged by an alert police officer downtown.
400 Block of East Anapamu keep the Peace while subject picks up their property.
415 Transient raising HELL at Pet Co 19 South Milpas.
Check the Welfare of a naked male near 1000 Steps.
5150 With dreadlocks yelling at passing vehicles Garden at Cota.
Code 40 raising HELL at McDonalds 29 North Milpas.
Suspicious U-Haul near Refugio loaded with people stopped near Winchester.
One in custody 2 North Milpas.
415 in 3400 Block of State Street HMA last seen toward Gelson's parking lot.
Shots heard in 1000 Block of Chino.
242 On East Cabrillo near the Fish House reporting party reports 4 males 242ed them.
Subject refusing to leave Casa De La Raza 600 Block of East Montecito.
1200 Block of Alta Vista code 60 truck blocking driveway.
Scanner Reports, Saturday:
SBPD seeking subject with dreadlocks in downtown area for threatening someone.
Someone detained near the Old Mission and Rocky Nook Park.
Suspicious vehicle in a parking lot in the 1100 Block of Coast Village Road silver Mercedes all smushed up doors open.
Albertsons 2200 Block of Cliff Drive known shoplifter copped a bottle of vodka police on da way.
20002 Hit and Run near Mountainview and Carrillo.
1144 Death in the city.
Report of a subject lighting clothing on fire and waving it around in Vera Cruz Park.
518 State Street subject passed out in wheel chair.
Library at the reference desk subject who previously threatened is there.
10851 UCSB Work Truck stolen white 2004 Ford truck 1184104.
415 Domestic Figueroa and Chapala HMA grey sweatshirt had female in purple sweatshirt in chokehold.
Mom injury traffic accident parking lot of Gelson's.
Full Fire response for 4 subjects stuck in an elevator Parking lot 9.
484 Vehicle 1700 Anacapa, not sure if it was 484 of a vehicle or inside the vehicle 484 being theft.
Canon Perdido at Bath 594 vandalism to a dumpster enclosure, graffiti.
2000 Block Sherwood drive overdose.
484 theft of razors from Rite Aid 35 South Milpas.
Guy laying in bushes refusing to leave near New House 227 West Haley.
High Speed Pursuit thru Buellton subjects caught don't know why they were running possibly drunk.
Loud music live band 800 Block of East Yananoli.
Subject refusing to leave Jack in the Box 500 North Milpas.
415 At the Wildcat HMA trying to fight with security.
Report of Fight 600 Block of Chapala.
Code 40 female down on the sidewalk Encienda at Salinas.
Report of Large Bonfire on Fellowship Road in someone's back yard engine 6 responded.
10851 Around 6pm from 66 Ocean View red VW convertible with New York plates FLY 3047.
Scanner Reports, Sunday:
Vehicle Fire in the engine compartment Chevron 400 Block of West Montecito.
101 Southbound North of Refugio Road a traffic accident Fire and medics responded.
Somewhere in the County a mother is attempting to burn down her son's home. No doubt the woman is a smoker torturing her son.
600 Block of East Anapamu a hot prowl intruder in home with resident. A male in his 20's bandage on his hand wearing a brown sweatshirt and blue jeans. I think police caught up to him.
Police ran a fellas name and he had a no bail warrant on a parole violation.
300 Block of West Mission on 415 Neighbors.
Premise check 700 Block of Lawrence Ave.
1500 Block of Dover Hill Road possible electrical Fire.
500 Block of West Pedregosa 242 Assault.
415 Male yelling 400 Block of East Ortega.
800 Block of East DLG Subject looking in windows.
Code 60 vehicle blocking 1400 Block of Bath Street.
Check the Welfare of the subject in the bushes Gutierrez and State Street.
Woman slashed her wrist in a suicide attempt in a motel on State Street.
Attempt 245 with vehicle on Los Carneros female suspect possibly headed home in Carpinteria.
415 Milpas at Cabrillo 10 transients drinking raising HELL throwing things in the street.
Near Bishop Diego High in the creek bad 594 with spray paint Graffiti on the rocks.
Dat is all for now, my fiends. Dog Willing, me and Pooh Bear will be back on Wednesday with more boring, some weird, and off the wall Scanner Reports. Later, Roger
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