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Candy Smuggler
updated: May 01, 2010, 10:10 AM
Dear Edda,
Usually on my way to the theater, I will stop off at the grocery store for a candy bar and then sneak it inside in my purse. The candy at the movie theater is just too darn expensive! I went to the movies last week with a co-worker. After the previews I took out two Snickers -- one for her and one for me. She refused to eat hers and basically accused me of stealing. Now I feel awkward at work. Whenever I see her, I think she is checking me out to see if I am smuggling any pens or tape out of the office.
What should I do? Is this friendship worth saving?
Signed,
Candy Smuggler
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Dear Candy,
Worth saving? Not really.
Back in the day, my friend and I prided ourselves in taking more and more elaborate meals into the movie theatre. Yes, five bucks for a bag of popcorn is ridiculous, but what's important here is the thrill of the adventure. Have you ever tried to fit a pizza in a large handbag? Fried chicken in a clutch? Well, trust me, you won't ever get these life affirming opportunities if you hang out with the candy bar police. Call me - I'll bring my tote bag.
-Edda
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Dear Edda,
I am in my early 40's. I work out a lot, and I am in pretty good shape (if I don't say so myself). My trouble is that my wife says that I shouldn't tuck in my shirt because it looks "stupid". But, if I don't tuck in my shirt, how am I going to show off my flat abs?
Signed,
Looking Good
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Dear Looking Good,
Have you ever checked out the mannequins in the sporting goods store? They are just a little bit bigger than life, and are just a little more ripped than is humanly possible. And they are clothed in a flimsy nylon workout shirt that looks more like paint than shirt. Now there's a way to show off those abs!
I guarantee that if you show up at your next social event wearing spandex under a nice sport coat, your mortified wife will not care about the whole tucked/untucked issue any more.
-Edda
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Edda Hatte is a loving and sympathetic advice columnist who helps Edhat subscribers navigate through their complicated and stressful lives.
Send your questions to askedda@edhat.com.
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Edda Hatte is a loving and sympathetic advice columnist who helps Edhat subscribers navigate through their complicated and stressful lives.
Send your questions to askedda@edhat.com.
COMMENT 73181P
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2010-05-01 10:01 PM |
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I'm all for sneaking stuff into the theater, but for the love of god, don't sneak food in crinkly bags and make noise for 20 minutes while you eat it.
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