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Scanner Reports 8-11-14
updated: Aug 11, 2014, 7:00 AM

By Roger the Scanner Guy

Monday-Monday. I can't get this Image out of my head; when Belinda got out of the hospital I bought her a lot of gifts like Christmas. One of the things I got her was what I thought to be Yardley skin cream, but it was Yardley liquid soap. It didn't look like liquid soap it looked like skin cream. She thought it was too. Anyway one night she told me after taking a shower she rubbed it all over hands, arms, legs, face, and she said it smelled so good she put it in her hair. Then she went to her easy chair and watched TV after a while she started to itch, then it felt like her face was sticky then she realized it was soap and she had to get up and take another shower. When I picture this in my mind of her sitting there the soap progressively getting itchier and stickier I laugh so hard especially since we both went through this just a few months ago. I think when she sees me laughing to myself she knows I'm laughing about that. I can tell she's getting a little pissed off but I can't stop it's so funny. I think she's sorry she told me, hee hee hee.

I hope you had a good weekend mine was OK. My sister helped me discover Aleve; it's the same pill as my medication but not as strong. Never liked taking pills as some of you know, my appearance might say different but I fool a lot of people that way without meaning to.

August 9th my 34 Year Anniversary of going into New House. Man that was a long time ago! 34 Years' Time goes fast when you grow up. It seems like yesterday. I still remember riding the MTD Bus out there for .35 cents, a guy named Jack gave me the money I was wearing ripped up blue jeans, a Harley shirt which was kinda burned up and my hair was also kinda burned. I was stoned and got a little too close to the camp fire. I was accepted and given a bed in a dorm room. The bed was beautiful. I lay down and slept for a few hours. Dinner was Spaghetti; I ate 9 or 10 plates. Someone paid me 5 bucks to wash their dishes I bought cigarettes, candy, and a soda I was in love. But it wasn't easy getting sober at 22 years of age, living inside, working, going to school, and washing everyone's dishes at dinnertime for 5 Bucks. I wonder what the going rate on washing dishes at New House is now. Maybe someone will tell me and give me bus fare. Fifty Bucks that sounds fair.

Coming up on my Five Year Anniversary with Edhat. Kinda hard to believe it myself doing this every day for 5 years. Doing anything every day for 5 years...Cheers!

Here's Your Scanner Roni Reports, FRYday:

  • Lewd Activity on the 4300 Block of Brown Street.
  • 415 Domestic in a trailer hooked up to the back of a truck in the 1800 Block of Cliff Drive.
  • Vandalism to a Jeep Grand Cherokee in the 800 Block of Bath.
  • 1400 Block of Jamieson 594, vandalism.
  • A big black dog named "Jack" jumped a fence on Lazaro Drive and is running loose.
  • Alcohol drinkers behind JJ's on Castillo.
  • Overdose on Ativan at Casa Esperanza 816 Cacique.
  • 10851 Vehicle theft investigation Casa Esperanza 816 Cacique wonder if this was the golf cart? They got it back.
  • Trespassing at 7-11, 331 West Montecito.
  • Report of moving truck on Fire highway 101 S.B. at Fairview not sure if it was a bad fire all the fire units went into service soon after the call went out.
  • Unknown type Medical Emergency near the 101 Deli on Salsipuedes.
  • Female detained 1200 Block of Punta Gorda not sure why possibly probation.
  • Seizures at MTD 1020 Chapala.
  • Fall Victim St. Vincent's 4200 Block of Calle Real.
  • 415 Argument over a private toe Smitty's Towing 100 Block of Helena, I consider my toes private too never show them off in public especially since I can't find a woman to clip em.
  • SBPD Officer transporting injured animal to Cares.
  • Bicyclist vs a car Victoria and State Street code 2 medics minor injuries.
  • Not sure I heard this right female down on the RR Tracks near Turnpike but might have been further South, I don't know if she was ever found.
  • 459 Burglary to a residence on Miguelito Canyon Road.
  • Check the Welfare of an elderly female in a vehicle Patterson and Calle Real unknown problem.
  • 415 Domestic Downtown S.B. Male dragging female Police responded after a scuffle sounds like the punk was arrested I hope he didn't fall down much.
  • Engine 6 shows up at a residence that had 3 low batteries in 3 separate smoke alarms they replaced all 3 for the residence that was very nice of them and a good reason to donate some money to the Firemen's Ball.
  • Alert one at the Santa Maria Airport.
  • Overdose on Casitas Pass.
  • 415 Domestic 700 Block of Bath Street female will not let the male leave and is being violent.
  • In the area of De La Guerra and Orange Ave. Possible 245, assault with a deadly weapon possibly a large knife. I did not hear original call just heard a cop talking about it. They were looking for a suspect in the 800 Block of Wentworth.
  • Report of 2 Transients camping on a front lawn 3700 Block of Lincolnwood.

    Scanner Roni Reports, Saturday:

  • SBPD Arrested someone in the 200 Block of West Mason for what I have no idea just happened to turn on the scanner at that precise moment early in the morning sounded like a felony though.
  • 415 Fight, 242 Assault, or Battery they said 242 Assault not Battery on the Scanner though 6800 Block of Trigo. Then there was a Medical for a 242 Assault Victim with a Traumatic injury at that same place in the 6800 Block of Trigo in I.V.
  • Highway 166 at Santa Maria River Bridge Vegetation Fire.
  • Check the Welfare of an elderly female laying on the ground in the 4200 Block of Calle Real.
  • 2 Homeless females fighting over the Handicapped stall at the Santa Barbara Pubic Library.
  • 417 Brandishing a handgun Subject in a white car brandished a handgun at the Library then drove off never to be seen again.
  • 1145 Male cutting himself up Suicidal in the County.
  • 415 Brothers fighting in the 1000 Block of Cliff Drive.
  • Medical Emergency heart attack 600 Block of East Cabrillo on the sand near the Life Guard Tower.
  • Check the Welfare of a black Lab K-9 Being dragged by an idiot near Mission and Bath streets police were unable to locate.
  • 242 Assault, reported as a 242pc Assault by the SBSO over the Scanner in the 500 Block of Seville.
  • Report that employees at Cottage hospital need help controlling an out of control 40 year old 300 pound male in the Hospital the SBPD Responded to assist.
  • County HMA knocked on someone's door and offered to mow their lawn for $ they said "No" he did it anyway then demanded 50 Dollars.
  • First block of Oak Street 459, Burglary to a residence.
  • Smoke investigation on Bath between Arrellaga and Micheltorena No Fire.
  • Subjects stealing Beer from CVS in Orcutt 2 subjects I think they got away too! Last seen heading North on Bradley.
  • Petty Theft near Skaters Point involving guy with no teeth riding a bicycle and the victim a man with a very big stick. I don't know if the victim ever got his change back it was very confusing call in the first place and even more confusing the 2nd time around.
  • Vehicle vs Bicyclist Dominion at Foxen Canyon, Fatal accident.
  • 242 Assault in the 900 Block of San Pasqual.
  • 242 Assault in the 200 Block of South Alisos.

    Scanner Roni Reports, Sunday:

  • Suspicious Subject stalking following a woman on Hendry's Beach HMA wearing shorts, Dodgers Cap female with the Lifeguard, male sitting behind the Life Guard Tower.
  • 415 Alameda Park Gazebo Subject yelling obscenities at other people.
  • Water main break near Waller Park in Santa Maria.
  • 459 Commercial Burglary on Linden in Carpinteria
  • 242 Assault investigation at Cottage ER as heard on the Scanner because I report what I hear on the Scanner.
  • SBPD Premise check Milpas and the RR Tracks.
  • Medical Emergency laceration from going thru a glass door.
  • Medical Emergency for Seizures in the 1300 Block of State Street.
  • 242 Assault HMA Assaulted a Female eating ice cream near Cacique and Milpas.
  • Fall Victim at Trader Joes 3000 Block of DLV possible head injury.
  • Marijuana Grow in a Garage on Sumter Road.
  • 415 Custody dispute female refusing ex Husband the court ordered right to see his twin Sons on the East Side of Santa Barbara.
  • 415, 4400 Block of Catlin woman screaming for help.
  • Traffic Accident 4 Injuries Foothill at Highway 154.
  • Traffic Accident highway 101 Southbound just North of Milpas one driver 12500, no license.
  • Unknown type Medical Emergency 3rd Floor Managers office Paseo Nuevo 700 Block of Chapala.
  • Grey Buick 23103 Reckless Northbound 101 got off near 5 Points.
  • 415 Subject Threatening to Stab people at Taco Bell on Fairview WMA. They went code 4 right away with one detained I heard the guy moaning in the background, kinda like maybe he's sorry for threatening to stab people.
  • 1400 Block of Sycamore Canyon Road medical for Seizures.
  • 1000 Block of State Street 2 Code, 40 Worthless Drunks male and female harassing passersbys.
  • 20002, Non-injury hit and run 200 Block of Ellwood Beach Drive.
  • Illegal Burn at a residence in the 1900 Block of Ironwood, then report of a possible structure fire at the same address on Ironwood in Santa Maria.

    Will that's enough outta me for now Have a Great Monday and Dog Willing we will see you on Wednesday. Later, Roger


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