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Scanner Reports 5-28-14
updated: May 28, 2014, 7:00 AM

By Roger the Scanner Guy

Will we made it to Hump Day. Tuesday Morning things was getting back to Abnormal around here when Joey Cannoli the arsholi chased Peter Cottontail into Ballistic Belinda's place, disrupting her morning coffee. All Hell broke loose as the slightly wounded rabbit ran under her sofa, she was screaming like there's no tomorrow, ripping the place apart looking for the rabbit. Joey Cannoli took off one way, Pooh Bear another with a collar around his little neck, to keep him from scratching an infection. I didn't get outta the way in time for her raging hostility yelling, "There's a friggen rabbit in the sofa bed hiding!!!" As if somehow it was my fault. I had to get to the bank get the last money I had in there out for food the rest of the week. "Hope you find him" I said and with that ran out the door. "Men! Damn!@#$$%^$#%^$#&% Men!" I heard her yell banging things around I did not look back. I got to the bank and went to Trader Joes, and Rite Aid then came back. Walking up the driveway I could still hear her screaming at the top of her lungs banging things around and throwing a fit. I put my food away and went over there to help and not 10 feet in front of me was Peter Cottontail peeking out of the bushes. Before anyone else could notice, he made a beeline for the fence and went under. Meanwhile Ballistic Belinda was still in her cottage screaming and yelling about that friggen rabbit. It was pretty funny; Peter Cottontail did not want to hide in her house, he escaped. I decided to wait for a while before telling her because the whole damn thing was very entertaining. But I didn't see karma was right there around the corner lurking. In my cottage I went, a freshly made pot of coffee on the microwave, eggs, tater tots frying in the pan. Karma attacked. There went the microwave, the coffee, the frying pan of eggs and potatoes, right off the side of the cabinet onto thy blessed floor! Ballistic Belinda wasn't screaming anymore, I was. And before anything else could happen I told her about the damn wabbit! If Joey Cannoli woulda got the wabbit in the first place, all this never woulda happened. It was all his fault.

Pooh Bear has an infection in his eye we have been trying to treat it for weeks but he keeps rubbing it making it worse. I'm kinda gtrateful he's only got 3 legs or he might be doing worse damage. Don't tell him I said that; he might take one of my eyes in my sleep. Now we have a collar around his neck so he can't scratch it at least now with his paw. He may need surgery to clean it all out and possibly remove a little pre-cancer. I'll be eating tofu next month saving up for the surgery cause as you all know Pooh Bear is my little buddy, and I love the little booger.

It was a very rough weekend around here with what happened in Isla Vista it didn't get me until Monday. I think I was in shock all weekend then Monday things started making sense as to how Elliott Rodger fooled the police. I read about the victims and pretty much spent most of Memorial Day crying. I know crying to some might not be the manly thing to do but for me it's a peaceful release and I've never been into that macho manly BS anyway. I think it's going to take a long time for our community to heal from this.

While watching a news program about the shooter Elliott Rodger I realized I too had been fooled once by someone I thought I knew and trusted. The guy was one of my best friends; I had known him for 25 years. I never suspected him of molesting his daughter. Then one day I read it in Edhat. I was so shocked having been molested myself I thought I should have known like I should have been able to tell. But I couldn't tell. I had no idea and I blamed myself for what happened to his daughter. For a long time I was afraid of my ex friend being released from jail because I was afraid of running into him and pushing his face in. I did not want to go to jail, but I was very angry. I called the jail every day to make sure he was still there. I don't feel hostile toward him anymore but I never want to see him again. Looking back when we were younger I remember him getting obsessed with women and not letting go of fantasies of being with them even after they told him they were not interested. I never saw him stalk them though, I never saw it coming. The weird thing for a split second looking at a picture of Elliott Rodger, I saw Robert sitting in his new Honda Accord. For a second they looked exactly alike; it was freaky. How can I blame the police when I too was fooled? It's sad to think we have to go through life distrustful of people but that's the way it is, I guess.

Here is your Scanner Reports, Monday:

  • Suspicious Circumstances 3600 Block of Eileen Way Heavyset man on bicycle in his 40's wearing backpack possibly casing area.
  • 594 Vandalism investigation at the Clark Estate.
  • Medical Emergency possible heart problem McDonalds 29 North Milpas.
  • Check the Welfare of a subject living in the 700 Block of Garden.
  • 415 Subject refusing to leave McDonalds 29 North Milpas.
  • Someone called in wires arcing in the 500 Block of East Yananoli but it was caused by moisture in the air and not a problem per Engine 2.
  • Report of a subject with a gun at a front door in the 1200 Block of Orchard Drive but police found nothing, or nothing I heard.
  • Medical Emergency in a black Dodge Charger in the 1100 Block of Coast Village Road.
  • 10851 Theft of Trailer on West Main in Santa Maria.
  • Medical Emergency heat exhaustion at Lake Cachuma.
  • Carrillo at DLV Unknown 415 One man tackles another then runs out in the street causing a disturbance when police get there two subjects are taken into custody.
  • Fall Victim at El Cap State Beach.
  • 415 Subject at the veterans memorial building.
  • 415 Subject challenging others to fight and 242ed Homeless man at Pershing Park.
  • Possible drowning on Huron Way in Santa Maria.
  • Medical Emergency unknown type on an inbound Frontier Airlines Flight 500 Fowler Santa Barbara Airport.
  • SBPD on a group Plaza Del Mar.
  • Medical Emergency on the Trail Inspiration Point Trail Head, but on the trail.
  • Seizures 300 Block of West Carrillo.
  • Subjects fighting near Alvarado and State Street 2 subjects possibly fighting.
  • UI Subject carrying a hatchet in his backpack Garden at Yananoli.
  • Man down in the walkway 1st East Anapamu.
  • Non-injury traffic accident with 415 argument Montecito at Rancheria.
  • Boogie Boarder in distress but made it to shore, Medics responded.
  • Angry subject walking Northbound on State hitting signs, walls, yelling etc.
  • Homeless guys drinking 400 North Alisos.
  • Juveniles with BB guns on a Balcony, 6800 Block of Phelps.
  • Check the Welfare of a female in a bra sleeping in a black BMW on Kenwood, she had pants on too.
  • 20002 Female driving a black pickup truck crashed into several parked cars in the 500 Block of West Arrellaga.
  • 415 Domestic a big guy shoved his girlfriend and her mother 300 Block of West Mission.
  • Fake ID at the Six Pack Shop on Pardall. Fake ID's, those were the days.

    Scanner Reports, Tuesday:

  • Female refusing to leave an address in the 200 Block of North Milpas.
  • Medical Emergency at the Casino.
  • 459 Audible alarm First block 0f East Ortega.
  • Customer refusing to leave Wells Fargo 3800 Block of State Street.
  • Medical Emergency 200 East Anapamu Chest Pains and Difficulty breathing.
  • 300 Block of Walnut 415 Homeless female causing problems.
  • Black Mercedes doing donuts Elings Park.
  • Trader Joes 29 South Milpas homeless male blocking traffic and yelling.
  • Possible overdose involving a child on Miramar Beach Drive.
  • 242 Assault investigation at Santa Ynez Cottage ER.
  • Road Rage 200 Block of Union subject in minivan Dodge Red threatening to 187 (murder) the reporting party. Male driver threatened the reporting party, his wife and kids also in the van were in the back seat.
  • Bicyclist into parked car injured at 26 South Calle Cesar Chavez, medics transported.
  • Drugs from a front yard on Castillo.
  • Unknown type shooting one shot through three walls then hit a TV Set in the 6500 Block of Pardall. Reporting party reported hearing a loud pop then seeing a hole in his wall. It sounded like after I posted this on a code red numerous reporting parties called 911. I did not mean to cause problems I just report what I hear on the scanner.
  • 415 Between roommates in the first block of North Alisos they were fighting over a 2,000 thousand dollar bicycle someone threw.
  • Vegetarian Fire 101 Southbound South of Clark.
  • 12 Year old riding bicycle holding Cross Bow on Primavera.
  • Report of Hang Glider over the side 50 feet on Gibraltar. This is Gibraltar Command.
  • 10851 Stolen Auto from Hotel Santa Barbara 500 State Street.
  • Parking Problem at the Boat House 2981 Cliff Drive.
  • Medical Emergency Choking victim 2700 Block of Painted Cave.
  • SBPD Delivered one for the Sobering Center.

    That's enough outta me for now. Out of some of the gifts I received for my birthday several people who know I'm diabetic bought me cake and ice cream. I've been nibbling on it here and there when you got a couple gallons of ice cream in the freezer, what can I say? Have a lovely Hump Day and Dog Willing We Will see you on FRYday. Later, Roger


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