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Scanner Reports 2-24-14
updated: Feb 24, 2014, 7:00 AM

By Roger the Scanner Guy

Well it's Monday again here in Santa Barbara another Day, another beautiful Sunrise and sunset, as usual. Recently a new business moved into the HOOD; a bicycle shop serving cruiser customers. I was over there the other day with my friend Fred and saw something I would not mind having if I could still ride a bicycle. It was a two tone brown Huffy Panama Jack. It had a place for a cold drink and a root beer bottle opener on it. I like the name of the bicycle itself Panama Jack. Kinda has a ring to it wouldn't you say? Fellers got a real nice set up over there in the back of 217 South Milpas; lots of room to work and they seem like good fellers. If you're looking for a cruiser bike might be a good place to check out. I heard the Pizza Hut thing ain't working out. I guess maybe it's Dog's Will I have to work for my pizza a little to get it I like Little Cesar's. But a Pizza Hut would be nice next door too! When you live in a Hood that has residences as well as businesses in it there's going to be noise it's just natural during opening hours you're going to hear all kind of activities going on this is a pretty noisy HOOD. You got the RR Tracks, the highway, the Shelter, Fire Station 2, a car stereo shop, two gas stations, nail salon, bakery, gym, an animal hospital, and other businesses near Indio Muerto; Batty's, Norton's, the Bicycle shop, and the Habit. There are a few residents here also. Business takes noise. Business cannot be conducted without some type of noise, especially music.

Music is nice soothing, relaxing it sooths the savage beast. But sometimes a savage beast will get a hair up where the sun don't shine about music being a little too loud and instead of requesting nicely that someone turn down their music it comes out in a ROAR, and that only offends the other person so they turn the music up. Then the unglued savage beast calls 911 the police come and ask the offended one to turn it down nicely because there really isn't much one can do about Business hours. The police leave, the unglued savage beast leaves, the offended one invites all his friends over and they scream and yell all friggin day. I only have one question? WHY CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET A BONG? The only noise that ever has bothered me in my HOOD is a certain business that has a Public Address radio at night after they close the employees get on that thing and try to sing and let me tell you they should stick to flipping burgers cause their voices SUCK!(But I'm not going to say who they are.) As far as real music goes none of it bothers me I even like rap. Just don't play any of that " Romantic I love you, you love me scrap" cause I'll jump off the pier. That stuff does kinda gets to me like Muskrat Love where the Muskrats are singing along with the song. It don't sound like Muskrats though it sounds like someone cutting the cheese I mean C'mon! No wonder Captain and Tennille broke up. Can you imagine sitting in a bar playing that song over and over again for 40 years?

I heard a 415 Loud Music call the other night it came from Swiney Road near Highway 246 and the music was coming from Down in the Riverbed so I guess maybe the campers were turning it up and doing a little partying down. "Down in the Riverbed." Which sounds like the name of a song in itself. This morning I heard a report of a Vegetation Fire in the same place as the loud music call, "Down in the Riverbed." But everyone went right back into service so if there was a fire there it sounds like it was small, like maybe they were cooking breakfast Down in the Riverbed doing the Breakfast Boogie. We all should be considerate of our neighbors no matter where we live or work. Do as I say SNOT as I do. I got Grand Funk Railroad Blasting a little DOG I JUST LOVE THIS OLD FOGEY MUSIC!

Remember the Rain we had a dozen years ago back in 1995? I was living in the 200 Block of West Haley my alarm clock went off in the morning to Order of Evacuation my HOOD was an Island. It scared the Holy Hell outta me to wake up that way. I jumped up grabbed my surf shoes put em on and ran out the door I did not know how slippery surf shoes were, I wasn't a surfer, my girlfriend bought me the shoes because my feet are sensitive to the rocks in the ocean. Anyway I hit the stairs and looked kinda like a dysfunctional Alpine Skier for a good 20 feet till I went down a 2nd set of stairs and landed on my ars. I got poison oak falling into the flood water. It was kinda fun swimming around in that flood water though. I remember this guy was on the State Street Bridge and he was going to dive in head first. Everyone was telling him to jump. He almost did it too. It was a good thing he didn't because there was a big old Cadillac under the water right where he woulda landed. Anyway I hope we have a good rain this week we really need it. So let's all do a little Rain Dancing this week even if you're like me. Shut the curtains, and the doors don't turn the music up to loud cause you don't want anyone to know you're dancing. DOG FORBID if someone should see me dancing even if it is for rain. I would die of embarrassment that is one of those things I don't do in public, and I used to work in a Disco. Don't tell anyone that, that's just between you and me.

Anyway here is Thy Blessed Scanner Roni Reports, FRYday:

  • 415 Homeless Folks Disturbing in the parking lot of the Lobero.
  • Highway 246 at Meadowvale, vehicle accident.
  • 415 Domestic in the 3400 Block of Santa Maria Way.
  • Report of Semis blocking 2 lanes of traffic at Foothill and Alamar.
  • This was weird in the 200 Block of North Milpas in a grocery store parking lot guy driving an older Ford truck with a buzz cut was beaten on something in the front seat he was last seen driving East on Montecito.
  • 242 Assault investigation at Cottage hospital.
  • 415 Homeless subject in front of the Apple store being rude to passersby wearing a Hawaiian Shirt OK "That's it. No more Hawaiian Shirts!"
  • 415 Fight Eastside of Sterns Warf 6 Homeless people 242ing each other.
  • Suspicious Red Jeep Cherokee no back plates front plate has a 2001 registration tag in the 400 Block of Loma Media.
  • 242 Two on One 100 Block of Orange in Goleta.
  • Traffic Accident vehicle vs bicyclist El Sueno at Calle Real.
  • Domestic Terrorists taking food off customers plates at the Habit 600 Block of State street that would be so annoying ya know?
  • 20002 Hit and Run tree into telephone wires in the 600 Block of West Carrillo.
  • Medical Emergency male in wheelchair at Santa Barbara and Haley streets possibly suffered a heart attack.
  • Juvenile Skateboarders 800 Block of Linden, "Oh No it's the Juvenile Skateboarders Gang get an Injunction quick!"
  • 1200 Block of Shoreline Illegal Burn, female burning papers near the bathroom.
  • Swiney at highway 246, we got to quit meeting like this. Shots heard fired down in the Riverbed possibly by a guy on a dirt bike down in the Riverbed last seen heading toward Lompoc down in the Riverbed.
  • SBPD assist Child Protective Services with paper work Canada at Punta Gorda.
  • 415 Domestic with Violence 4000 Block of Via Lucero.
  • 200 Block of West Alamar 459 to residence.
  • Female beating up a male in the 600 Block of West Gutierrez.
  • 23152 Driver in a rental hit the curb in the 300 Block of East Cabrillo near Chase Palm Park in a Grey Mustang.

    Scanner Roni Reports, Saturday:

  • The Lobero Theatres illegal campers ongoing problem near the mailbox.
  • Traffic stop on a subject with warrants 100 South Salinas.
  • Homeless 415 Subject ran out by two otters chasing him down the street from Hot Spots 35 State street.
  • Theft investigation 3000 Block of Foothill.
  • Report of Single engine Cherokee airplane flying over the Harbor with black smoke coming from it. That sent out City and County Fire Alerts to the Airport for a plane possibly about to crash then for some unknown reason the plane decided to land somewhere else. A witness who saw a plane commented on Edhat that there was a plane in the area at the time that was a stunt plane and blue smoke which is used in stunts was coming from the plane, it was probably the same plane but that's just my opinion.
  • Linden at Sandyland report that a man that looks 70 and confused is walking around in circles.
  • South Refugio at Via Ranchero there was a report of a vehicle on fire but out before the fire department arrived.
  • Medical Emergency for a male down near stairs in the 700 Block of Cliff Drive.
  • 415 Homeless guy yelling in Marina 2 Disturbing.
  • 20002 Hit and Run investigation in the 500 Block of East Arrellaga.
  • A male that was West Bound on Alamar from State Street shoved a female with a duffle bag, possible 211 Robbery attempt. I don't think the woman with the duffle bag or the subject that shoved her were around when the police got there.
  • The SBPD Land Shark is Cruising the streets, Look Out.
  • 415 Domestic Hubby following his wife in a car I think she was in a blue Volvo and he was in a black Accord she pulled over in the 300 Block of Valero to let the police catch up. I think the Hubby split he figured out her intention, sometimes I really miss being in a relationship.
  • Medical emergency in the 800 Block of Bath SBPD had to respond first because there was a subject that lived in the home that has fought the Law before but that person is in jail at this time, so Fire and Medics were cleared to go in.
  • 10851 Recovery of stolen auto DLG Plaza.
  • Engine one was en route to 1822 DLV for training I hate to hear that.
  • Medical Emergency in front of Mac's for an unresponsive subject.
  • Valero at Calle Pointe injury accident between a bicyclist and a vehicle.
  • Traumatic injury on the Soccer Field at Carpinteria Middle School.
  • 415 Homeless subjects behind the 1200 Block of Coast Village Road raising HELL and refusing to leave.
  • Check the Welfare of a juvenile in a stroller being pushed by a man with grey hair Yelling and Cussing at Carrillo and Miramonte I hope they got the kid away from that guy quick.
  • 484 At Victoria Market 2 18-Packs of Coors, one Light one regular. I used to steal beer when I was drunk too I got drop kicked in the chest one time stealing a case of Milwaukee's Best. Blew the wind outta me the guy gave me the case he was afraid I was gonna sue the good old days getting my ars kicked for a beer!
  • Report of a 5150 Elderly Male in the 600 Block of State Street who continuously called 911 to report the Homeless were harassing him. First they called from Metro 4 Theatres then I think they were on the corner, then Urban Outfitters. I was surprised the homeless subjects were not calling the police on him.
  • Someone was refusing to leave Tupelo Junction in the 1200 Block of State.
  • There was a Dine and Dash at Joe's in the 500 Block of State Street.
  • Boogie Woogie Loud Music coming from Down in the Riverbed at highway 246 and Swiney Road.
  • 20002 Hit and Run non-injury 101 Southbound near Turnpike. At first the subject pulled over to exchange information but fled after the other driver smelled alcohol on his breath. Victim vehicle a grey SUV, Suspect vehicle a grey sedan.
  • Group of homeless raising HELL Drinking in city lot 11.
  • Drunk Female in the Store Albertsons on Casitas Pass. Boy People just LOVE that Alcohol!
  • Lewd Subjects in the Parking lot of Zodo's sounds like there was a couple doing the Forbidden act in a car.
  • Indecent Exposure at the Sand Man Inn.
  • Woman yelling and throwing things in the 200 Block of West Victoria.
  • 154 at 246 Vehicle fire.
  • 23152 Beige Camry in the 500 Block of Chiquita Road.

    Scanner Roni Reports, Sunday:

  • Medical Emergency subject hemorrhaging in the 1400 Block of Linden.
  • Suspicious noises coming out of a laundry room in the 300 Block of Matilda never did find out what was going on there.
  • Carp State Beach near San Miguel Camp grounds 2 older males carrying fishing gear, "Oh no it's The 2 Old Men Carrying Fishing Gear Gang!"
  • Fall victim head injury in the church 21 East Constance.
  • Water Main Break in Carp near Casitas Pass and Carpinteria Creek.
  • Code 40 DRUNK Down knife in his waist band First West Cabrillo.
  • Possible Shots heard in the 700 Block of Miramonte.
  • Vegetation Fire highway 101 at Clark in the field West of the freeway in Santa Maria.
  • Premise Check at Franklin School 1100 East Montecito.
  • Theft investigation Firestone in the 3900 Block of State Street.
  • Harbor Patrol on a drunk in the Marina 4 restrooms.
  • Fall victim head injury New House 3 2400 Block of Bath Street in the back.
  • 101 Southbound at Evans motorcyclist down.
  • Medical Emergency for a code blue and 1144 on the North End of Town.
  • Smoke investigation in the 1800 Block of Cliff Drive nothing found.
  • 459 Burglary investigation to a vehicle in the 3900 Block of Via Lucero.

    Will that's it outta me for now Have a Great Monday and Dog willing we will see you on Wednesday. Later, Roger


     

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