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Scanner Reports 12-20-13
updated: Dec 20, 2013, 7:00 AM

By Roger the Scanner Guy

Well it's FRYday. Five shoplifting days left till Christmas. Will I didn't win the Mega Jackpot. Got my 2 bucks back though; sure would be nice to win a couple million one of these days. Been hearing a lot about SCUM SUCKING THEIVES stealing packages as I was just thinking about mentioning it to you guys there was a piece about it on Good Morning America. There must be a real problem with it here because when my FedEx guy came by the other day he asked if it was ok if he left packages for my neighbors with me. Kinda makes me want to put some less than desirable items in a package and put it on the porch unattended. How about a nice big box full of wasps, JERK FACE? Ha,ha,ha. I used to like to lock my Mountain Bike with a U-Lock where you couldn't really tell the bike was locked, sit nearby and wait for idiots to try and steal my bicycle. When someone would I'd jump up and yell, scare the scrap out of them it was fun. A few years ago I discovered some idiot casing my mailman. I didn't catch him but he almost got hit by a car running across Milpas from me. MAGGOT SCUM BAGS. There is no shortage of names I can make up for people that steal Christmas gifts. I'd really like to get ahold of that guy they showed on G.M.A who got his kid to steal packages. Oh how I'd make him scream. If you got packages coming, talk to your neighbors and see if the delivery person will leave them with your neighbors it SUCKS getting ripped off especially at Christmas. It's hard enough getting a few bucks together to buy gifts, or if you got credit you've already been reamed by the retailers then you get ripped again.

I shouldn't say bad things about maggots; at least they serve a purpose. Ten years ago from the 19th I lost one of my favorite people in the World. She taught me a lot of good things and she loved Christmas. I didn't find out she died till Christmas Eve after she was gone forever from this life. It ruined my Christmas back then for a couple years. She had been my girlfriend and I still saw her once in a while. I never saw anyone again but that's because I'm an old cranky fart set in my ways. She was one HELL of a good woman. I was blessed to have her in my life for a few years. I don't get depressed at Christmas anymore missing her. I remember the Good times we had. It's weird losing loved ones when times are supposed to be good. My Mother's birthday is December 9th and back in 1989 her 2nd Husband suddenly passed away the day before her Birthday after taking her out to Dinner. They were on their way home, he pulled over and died. She started dating again about a year after he passed. She'd still be dating but her last boyfriend broke up with her. He got tired of driving 75 miles each way to take her out. I don't blame him he's close to 90! You get old enough you see many friends pass on covering almost every day of the year you realize they have their journey and you have yours, and remember the blessings they bought to you in life and the good memories you have of them are some of the gifts they left behind. One of you guys sent me a Christmas card the otter day and told me you thought of me as family. That really got me right in the chops! That was real nice. Now Edhat will NEVER get rid of me.

Here's Your Scanner Roni Reports, Wednesday:

  • At Alvin and Broadway in Santa Maria a woman was attacked and cut on her hand by a Dirtbag with a knife. A lot of this scrap going on lately. She got cut because she fought him off, loved that scene on GMA where the people on the bus got that punk down with the gun and had him arrested.
  • Overdose on Benadryl in the 500 Block of West Arrellaga.
  • 415 Domestic in the 500 Block of Myrtle Ave.
  • Medical emergency for an ill subject at the Shell Station in the 3000 Block of State Street.
  • Traffic Accident 101 Southbound at Mission.
  • 484 Theft in the 3700 Block of Roblar Ave.
  • Traffic stop 300 West Haley had been a slow failure to yield but they pulled over and all was well.
  • 800 Block of Cacique street on a pedestrian.
  • Code 40, HELL RAISIN' DRUNK in the 400 Block of State Street.
  • Illegal burn in the 800 Block of Shoreline at Ledbetter subject uncooperative with the Park Ranger.
  • Code 2 Medics in the 300 Block of Barranca.
  • Medical Emergency at the county jail for chest pains.
  • Possible overdose at The Fiesta Inn 1800 Block of State Street.
  • Storke at Hollister traffic accident.
  • Check the Welfare of a woman on a bus bench in the 900 Block of State.
  • Possible drug deals going on in the 700 Block of Millstone in the County.
  • 245 Assault with a deadly weapon investigation at Cottage ER occurred Downtown.
  • Suicidal at Risk female missing out of Lompoc.
  • Overdose on pills in a Cliff Drive residence.
  • 400 Block of North Voluntario group of subjects hanging out and making too much noise.
  • Chapala and Islay several subjects loitering on the corner look like Gang Types wearing black gloves possibly casing the area.
  • Fall victim head injury Central Coast Nursing 3880 Via Lucero the ground must be sloped weird there because I hear this a lot.

    Scanner Roni Reports, Thursday:

  • Confined K-9 Dog in the Laundromat at Canon Perdido and Milpas might have been previously called in as a stray dog.
  • Fall Victim 1100 Block of East DLG.
  • Fall Victim with a head injury at a residence in the 1500 Block of Bath Street.
  • Motel 6 3505 State Street heavy odor of marijuana coming from a room with heavy foot traffic.
  • AMR Transport from private residence to Cottage for (CARES).
  • Possible Structure Fire in the first block of Tuckerwood.
  • At Friendship Manor the Food Director was punched in the face by a resident. When I get old that is where I want to go I hear a lot of wild stuff going on there.
  • Party rental truck parked in the red in the 1400 Block of San Andreas since Wednesday night.
  • One in custody 816 Cacique.
  • 484 Shoplifter doing their Christmas shoplifting in custody at Sears La Cumbre Plaza.
  • Stabbing investigation in Cottage ER victim has multiple wounds.
  • Fall Victim near the Health Center at Val Verde.
  • Assist Probation attempting to capture a wanted probationer in the 1300 Block of DLG Road.
  • A couple of Old farts male and female fighting over recycling at the Albertsons on Calle Real in Goleta.
  • Checking on a probationer in the 400 Block of East Cota.
  • Illegal burn reported behind the Goleta Library SBSO Responded and canceled the fire department not sure why but they were speaking with the supposed subject that lit the fire per anonymous reporting party.- Hunters were shooting too close to a plant on Santa Rosa Road, I don't know what kind of plant it was but the Plant manager reported them.
  • Suspicious subjects behind Santa Barbara county jail. All I heard there.
  • 415 2 Subjects yelling on East Figueroa near Milpas, don't know if it's a fight or argument or what. Just yelling is what I heard.
  • Officer flagged down in the 1100 Block of North Milpas by reporting party.
  • Little Dog stuck in a drain somewhere in Montecito. It sounds like the fellas at Engine 91 got him out. Not sure where the doggy is now but they rescued the little feller.

    Will that's all outta me for now Have a Wonderful Weekend before Christmas and The Little Doggie Willing we will see you on Monday. Later Gators! Roger


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