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Scanner Reports 9-18-13
updated: Sep 18, 2013, 7:00 AM
By Roger the Scanner Guy
It's Wednesday Hump Day! Many years ago when I first came to Santa Barbara and I was a bum I worked all the time whenever I could if I wasn't working I was drinking, or sleeping. I loved to work though I was young and strong so anytime the offer was there I worked. I was working every day on one stretch having a steady job for a couple weeks one day I heard there would be extra work tearing down the circus at Earl Warren Showgrounds it was from 9pm to around 2am ish. I decided I'd show up if they had enough workers I'd sleep in the weeds somewhere on the grounds. In between working I decided on a pint or two of the Beam, not a good choice I got tossed out of the Sally where they were serving one of my favorite gourmet meals of Beans and Rice. It sounds like a simple dish but there is a special way of making the dish that makes it better than just about anything else one can eat. It didn't matter though that day they kicked me out for being too drunk. I missed out because I choose the Devils Brew instead. I was really drunk instead of going to a restaurant like a normal person would I went to see what Sally had in her trash can.
There was a box of half frozen bean burritos Wow! What a score that was. I grabbed the box and took off on the way to the Showgrounds I ate a few of the damn things. I got to Earl Warren in plenty of time and was picked to work. For a time everything went well me and a couple other guys lifted this crank thingy to bring down the tent it was quite heavy even with three men holding onto it. I was the dipstick in the middle suddenly they both let go. The thing was really heavy and it damn near ripped my arms out of my shoulders hanging onto it but I did barely, they laughed then grabbed hold. Ha real funny it wasn't too long after that I started feeling real thirsty then really sick to my stomach I asked someone where the hose was and that's where I spent the next couple hours drinking water and throwing up. I was bummed I couldn't work anymore. I couldn't leave that hose I'd no sooner barf than want more water. I couldn't figure out what happened to me but just as soon as I got sick I felt better. I didn't expect to get paid because I only put in a couple hours I was kinda shocked but grateful when someone handed me an envelope and did not look inside jammed it in my pocket and headed for 7-11. I had an hour to spare before beer time cut off and I aimed to get me some. On the way there I opened the envelop and thought someone had made a mistake as there was several hundred dollars in there. The job was worth 30 or 40 dollars at best. I wasn't going to go back and tell em they made a mistake. I got to 7-11 got me a sandwich and a sixer. I went out front sat on the sidewalk popped a beer and took a nice long pull then I ripped into the torpedo no sooner had I taken another drink a SBPD car pulled in and there was T.R. Always showing up at the wrong time. I offered him a beer and he said "No not on duty and you can't either not here anyway." He asked me if I felt OK. I said I did now after barfing half the night. He told me to get into the car and he took me to Cottage. I told them what happened they checked me out gave me the free and clear and cut me loose. Turns out someone saw me take that box of burritos out of the trash and called the law there was rat poison sprinkled on top TR was out looking for me. I don't know what made it work so quick on me maybe it was the whiskey, or the work but Thank Dog I barfed it out and flooded my system with water if I woulda just passed out somewhere. I woulda been found dead.
I was thinking about this after my neighbors poisoned the gophers now the otter day. I gotta worry about my cat eating one of those gophers, and not only that but I feel for those little animals since I know what it's like to ingest the stuff myself. It might seem funny to some of you but I didn't sleep too good last night thinking about those poor animals suffering. If I had a garden and the gophers started eating from it I'd let em I'd rather lose the garden than make some poor little animals suffer having experienced it myself. Just the way I am having experienced it myself. Some people just don't give a damn about others or their animals. They just want their space to look pretty; screw everyone else. Same thing on the road some motorists going from one place to another they don't care who or what is in the way just run em down if they get in the way! Makes me wish I had a Wood Chipper real bad right now; a great big Wood Chipper an SUV could fit into. Build a Wood Chipper tunnel tell the greedy bass turds there's a pot of gold on the other side make em pay a toll as they go thru 5 Bucks a car load Right this Way Free Hair Cuts with the Toll! Just gonna take a little off the top, Enjoy the Ride hee hee hee.
Hair is your Scanner Roni Reports, Monday:
Assault victim found to the back of Vons Turnpike 242 appears to have occurred Sunday night.
Fall victim 30 years old corner of Canon Perdido and Chapala.
Allergic reaction to Bee sting difficulty breathing 4000 Block of Foothill.
Yeller, Yelling screaming at students at SBCC.
Vegetation Fire behind the Elks Lodge 100 Block of Kellogg.
Subject evading police on skateboard near Canon Perdido and Nopal.
Juvenile problem 1500 Block of Central a dozen juveniles fighting unknown if weapons.
Combative Code 40, Drunk woman on the wharf fighting with Harbor Patrol they were requesting back up and got it.
At the Pine Grove Baptist Church on East Ranch Road two parents of different children were reported to be in a 415 physical fight the male was 6'2 beating on a woman. Will Praise the Lord Jerks!
Medical Emergency for a man down at Stearns Wharf.
415 Angry subject breaking things inside apartment 700 Block of West Cota.
2100 Block of Red Rose 415 Domestic.
Medical Emergency for a subject in a burgundy Corvette with traumatic injuries not from an auto accident on Harris Grade.
Medical Emergency for a traumatic injury at Hollister and Kellogg.
5150 Female at the station lobby with nowhere to go wants to go to jail, or PHF.
488 Theft from the casino.
Olvera at 11th loose pit bull.
273.5 Domestic violence male beat female unconscious Carrillo at Anacapa, I think it was there.
Hazard investigation noises coming from the top of a sparking telephone pole they must have been bouncing off the top of my head.
415 Fight 1200 Block of Chino then broke up walking South moments later there was a foot pursuit in the area most likely involving the same subjects.
Scanner Roni reports, Tuesday:
415 Homeless man harassing passersby on a bench in front of 1114 State Street.
484 Found Bicycle that was stolen but not reported found at the Library on the Anapamu side.
SBPD on a group at the Plaza Del Mar on Castillo.
Code 2 Fire for a fluid spill after an accident, code 2 medics for minor injuries Cota at Chapala.
Check the Welfare of a Suicidal subject who threatened to shoot themself in the County police know his address we don't need it.
Hazard condition in 600 Block of Garden Street, something about a leaky valve I think I got one of those myself but I'm not calling the fire department to check it out.
484 Theft of merchandise from Blue Eyed Girl 1021 State Street.
Illegal camper in RV Figueroa at Chapala.
415 Fight 8 subjects behind 7-11 7300 Block of Calle Real in Goleta.
Building 548 Santa Cruz dorm, the elevator is stuck with one soul on board.
470 Investigation Arch Rock Fish, Forgery.
23103 Reckless grey Honda cutting people off flipping them the bird South on Patterson last 3 on the plate 490 registered in Solvang.
Medical Emergency subject collapsed code blue on Armentos.
Traffic Stop 200 Block of North Milpas.
Check the Welfare of a man walking in the middle of Storke Road pushing a grocery cart.
23103 Reckless red Mercedes 5JYX??? Albertsons 5100 Calle Real heading toward Fairview.
5150 Transport to Vista Del Mar didn't say from where Vista Del Mar is in Ventura.
Vehicle blocking 500 Block of APS A white Ford F-150.
Check the Welfare of a Scanner Report regular who left threatening messages on a friend's message service on San Pasqual.
Will that's enough outta me for now Have a great Hump Day and Dog Willing We Will see you on FRYday. Later, Roger
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