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Scanner Reports 2-15-13
updated: Feb 15, 2013, 7:00 AM

By Roger the Scanner Guy

Spank Dog it's FRYday! Hows About we talk about Parks Today? There is a lot of Illegal Activity in Parks Lately. Since Camping is considered to be Illegal that is one of the subjects we can rap about. I hear a lot of Police Calls in the Parks. I have been hearing more lately and it seems that each park is becoming its own little community, especially those within our City Limits.

For years I have heard about problems in Down Town Parks, Oak Park and McKenzie. From what I hear the highest amounts of calls go to Pershing, the Waterfront, McKenzie and Oak Park, of course I'm forgetting Bohnett, East Side, and Vera Cruz NEVERMIND! Fig Tree Park. Recently though it seems the Samarkand Oak Park Area has been under attack. Reports of illegal campers sleeping in back yards. Reports of thefts in both areas although I don't think that all illegal campers are thieving maybe some but not all. I've heard some illegal Camping calls in Stevens Park lately and I hardly ever hear anything going on there. The city ought to make it legal for people to sleep in parks regulate it, hire some more rangers, make some money out of it. In the middle of each park there could be a little building with Washers Dryers, Showers, Lockers for storage a little store combination post office. Charge five bucks a head per night. We'd probably be able to fit a couple thousand people in Oak Park alone. Stevens with all its nooks and crannies at least 3,000 people. We would make a fortune!!! I'm sure with all the room in our parks we could house at least another 80,000, more People easy! We could Stock Alice Keck and Chase Palm Park ponds with Trout and charge 5 bucks a fish. We could turn a negative into a positive since we're going to have illegal campers anyway let's make money off of them. We do drunks, we make a ton of money off of drunks. Between the bars downtown, and the ones at County Jail we got quite a little racket here.

Years ago when I worked at a certain mall at the corner of State and La Cumbre streets our night security guard rented out the entire 2nd floor to illegal campers. He made 28.00 off us before taxes for an 8 hour shift, and 400.00 cash a night off a few dozen campers that wanted to sleep in a warm secure place. I never knew anything about it till he quit then opened up a Harley shop somewhere. I hated him I worked the day shift occasionally I'd get a free piece of candy at the candy store and 28.00 a day before taxes. Ah the good old days. Maybe since this is my idea to rent out the parks, maybe someone could kick me down a few bucks because I'm going to need and buy protection from all the residents trying to kill me. I'm just kidding but I probably gave someone the idea. If anyone would like to share an experience they had at the park or at home concerning this subject or any other feel free to do so.

I went next door and looked around for camp sites since the little problem we had the other night. I found 3 pieces of cardboard leaning against a wall where the elevator is. It was a mess there at least one person sleeping there. I looked behind the dumpster there was more cardboard and what looked like camping gear. I observed at least one camp over the back fence at 211 South Milpas. While I was snooping around one of the neighbors came home. He had a dozen roses he told me they were for his wife, but I know they were really for me. He told me the other night the guy that sleeps behind the dumpster came HOME with two nice bicycles and a Laptop computer. Gee I wonder where he got those. My neighbor also told me that the camping is a nightly thing and he is tired of calling the police. "Nothing ever gets done." He said. That is the third person that told me about people camping back there. If we are going to allow people to illegally camp in our city then it should be regulated. There needs to be RULES! Getting woke up in da middle of the night listing to all that hooping, hollering LOUD SAX. Shooting, now these guys will probably be opening up a fencing operation I think we should at least get paid off down here a little score. Regulate Illegal camping that way we could all share in the profits.

Here is your Scanner Reports, Wednesday Happy Humpster Day:

  • Medical Emergency 400 Block of South G street Fall victim head injury.
  • Something don't know what occurred in Pershing Park whatever it was happened before I woke up and I was hearing the leftovers it sounded like maybe some type of assault.
  • Somewhere in the city was an 1144, that is a death most likely which occurred in someone's home it did not suspicious at all. Of course nothing ever does around here.
  • 101 Northbound North of highway 150 Vehicle accident one injury.
  • Medical Emergency at Mason and Milpas possible bad reaction to medication.
  • Heard there was a subject Hispanic male adult wearing a white backpack shooting a gun on Venoco property, did not get which Venoco property suspect it was in Carpinteria.
  • 4 Transients squatting in a vacant house in the 100 Block of North Milpas.
  • SBSO was checking out the Sandy Land Cove area I have no idea why?
  • 101 Southbound South of Milpas unknown if injury traffic accident it was on the Los Patos off-ramp non-injury leaking fluids.
  • Sexual Battery somewhere on Loma Street.
  • 5 Subjects smoking Mary Jane at Oak Park Lane and Pueblo.
  • 7900 Block of Winchester Circle 20002 Hit and Run attempting to drive away in a black car.
  • Another Code 40 male yelling for help at McKenzie Park or possibly in someone's back yard.
  • Child Abuse Investigation at the Station occurred on Hickory.
  • Trash Fire behind the 3000 Block of State Street.
  • 459 Burglary to a residence in the 500 Block of Miles street.
  • 242 Assault at Jimbos in the 2700 Block of DLV.
  • Transient yelling in the 100 Block of West Mason.
  • SBPD was looking for a patient whom left Cottage without permission possibly wearing an IV I don't know if they ever found him but they were looking everywhere.
  • First East Haley medical emergency for a diabetic problem.
  • Premise check at Pershing Park.
  • 415 Domestic in the 2000 Block of Monterey Street.
  • Someone called in and reported that they thought there was a fire near Winchester Gun Club but there was no fire. Better to be safe than sorry.
  • Report of 242 Assault at 235 East Cota the Alano Club.
  • Vehicle rollover Hot Springs at Coast Village.
  • 415 Domestic First Block of Ocean View Boyfriend hitting girlfriend's car. I don't know if he was punching it or smashing into it.
  • I have no idea where this was happening in the County is all I know 415 Domestic where the abuser was actually picking a woman up and throwing her. The last thing I heard was there was a gun in the house but I did not hear a location.

    Scanner Reports Valentine's Day:

  • A lot of 415 Domestics Valentine's Day makes me wish I had an old lady...NOT!!! I remember when I was a drunk had this gal I saw on West Micheltorena named Donna. I made money back then and no matter what I did (I wasn't physically abusive toward women) she would always forgive me and my wallet was always a bit lighter when I left. I was kinda of a big mouth as ya all can imagine. The next day I would be at Donna's door Promising over and over again to be a good boy and NOT act like a fool ever again I'd say..." Oh Honey, Baby Doll please let me into your heart again I love you Sweetheart, I'm so sorry." It makes me sick now. Remembering that, Mushy, mush, mush. I was really angry when I found out she was with other guys when I was at work, I wanted my money back.
  • Illegal lodger 600 Block of State Street.
  • Down in Carpinteria someone was having a mental breakdown.
  • Medical Emergency in the 200 Block of West New Love man down.
  • Burglary to a vehicle in the 1000 Block of East Gutierrez.
  • Domestic violence somewhere on Anapamu.
  • Male down behind the 2900 Block of DLV.
  • 415 5150 Inside the Apple Store yelling and throwing things.
  • Possible overdose 100 Block of Chapala.
  • Drunk Driver driving around the Mesa in a white Jeep Liberty SBPD caught up with him at Hendry's beach.
  • 2 Transients yelling and raising HELL in front of Something's Fishy 500 Block of State Street.
  • Transient changing a flat tire on a bicycle in traffic near the Milpas Roundabout 41 South Milpas.
  • Threats investigation at the Mental Wellness Center in the 600 Block of Garden.
  • White Mercedes parked in the drop off zone in front of the main post office 800 Block of Anacapa.
  • 415 Female refusing to leave the East Side Library 1102 East Montecito.
  • Fall Victim head injury at the Villa Santa Barbara 227 East Anapamu.
  • SBPD looking for a cutter last seen driving away from the 800 Block of Cacique with blood on his face.
  • 3700 Block of Modoc medical for a fractured wrist.
  • Be on the Lookout for a stolen white Specialized 18-Speed mountain bike, grey bike with white lettering.
  • Report of man with bloody face on the freeway, must have been near Milpas because he was found at Kimberly and Nopalito Fire and Medics responded for an assault victim.
  • Injury Accident Mira Monte and Carrillo vehicle vs bicyclist.
  • Cacique and Milpas injury traffic accident near the 101 Bridge 2 cars involved.
  • 415 500 Block of State Street, transients.
  • Unknown exact location the Carpinteria side of the bridge Hispanic male grabbing Hispanic female around the neck.
  • 415 Transient disturbing Vera Cruz Park.
  • 417 Brandishing a knife Cota and State in front of Joes between 5 people not sure where they all went but the suspect was last seen East on Haley.

    That is all your getting out of me for now unless something important happens then I'll Code Red it. My back has a pulled muscle and it's not just my back anymore I got pinched nerves all over my body like 24/7 not getting much sleep because I'm cramping all over the place no pun intended. I am in extreme agony I'm glad for those of you that will be happy to hear this. Anyway Have a Wonderful Weekend and Dog willing we will see you on Monday. Love, Roger


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