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Mentoring Groups
updated: Feb 11, 2013, 8:00 PM

I know of 5 twelve year old boys who seem lost. They don't really have an activity nor do they have someone watching over them when they get home. Are there any programs or mentoring groups in town to help these at rick boys?

Places People Are Talking About:

Boys & Girls ClubThe Unitarian Society

What People Are Saying:

 COMMENT 373494P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 08:06 PM

Five boys and they're all age 12? Are they friends? Do they live near one another? Do they attend the same school? Some demographic info would be useful.


 COMMENT 373507 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 08:44 PM

Yeah, we don't have a beach to surf, snorkel,fish ( free on the pier), we don't have a skate park, we don't have hills and mountains to ride your bike or hike in, or miles of bike paths, or a Boys & Girls Club on the East AND Westside, or a City Parks and Rec department with programs galore, or libraries, or after school study programs or school sports... Yeah, there are just no opportunities for kids in this town; No wonder there are so many gang banger wanna-be's............


 COMMENT 373511 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 08:57 PM

12 year olds seem a bit young to be lost already. Where are their parents? Are they not involved? Aware?


 COMMENT 373517P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 09:05 PM


sliding scale if need be.


 ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 09:15 PM

A person asks a question and gets condemned on Edhat.. come on people show alittle compassion not everyone knows where to find help..That is why they are asking.


 COMMENT 373528P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 09:37 PM

No Roger, no one is condemning them. As 507 states, there are numerous activities for 12 year olds.

When I was 12 my parents gave me full rein of activity, as long as I was home for dinner. Maybe the question should be asked of the parent.


 COMMENT 373534 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 09:46 PM

Agreed, Roger, there are PLENTY of city-sponsored activities for youths that are helpful to such at-risk kids. If they'd only choose them over gang-related tagging activities they'll be fine.


 COMMENT 373536P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-11 10:29 PM

AHA (academy of healing arts) is a great program, but I'm not sure what age they start.



 COMMENT 373560 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 06:42 AM

Reaching out to 5 separate boys with the expectation of them all changing is going to next to impossible. Although, I feel they are just about at the age where maybe they can still turn around before becoming idiots as teens.

Not sure the situation here, but the parents need to get them interested in something. As the previous poster sarcastically stated, there are plenty of things around here that don't require a mentoring group. Hiking, biking, surfing, swimming, whatever. Why not simply ask the kids what they want to do? Summer is coming up in a few months, and with nice weather approaching, that's the perfect opportunity for them to get sucked into a good hobby.


 COMMENT 373564 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 06:53 AM

I'm trying to figure out how a non-related adult would "know" five 12-year olds well enough to determine that they're "lost".

The only plausible thought that comes to mind is the person is a teacher, but if that were so, the person would already know the answer to the question they are posing.

I call shananagins.


 COMMENT 373570 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:04 AM

Boy Scouts is a terrific program for boys ages 11-17. I've been one and been an active parent of several. Scouting relationships have at times been a lifeline for them. Boys ARE at higher risk right now in our culture. In Scouts, kids get to learn skills they themselves respect and work on character and leadership. And they spend a lot of time outdoors. It works especially well when parents are involved.


 COMMENT 373571P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:06 AM

Send them over to the English lady who directs Upstarts Youth Theatre over on the campus of Peabody. My kids were both in that theater company. Every year she takes a few kids with " way too much time on their hands" and puts them to work with her building sets, painting, making things, helping some of the young oerforners. She is no nonsense with a huge heart- it's something to do with Peabody school but she is there on weekends. I saw rhose kids flourish with her and enjoy themselves.


 COMMENT 373578 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:26 AM

Bici centro--fixin up bikes!


 COMMENT 373581 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:38 AM

Tell them about the Law of Toys. "If you do no (home)work as a kid, you receive no Toys as an adult". Everyone who does nothing (work wise) gets nothing. In general this is true. I call them NoHo's, for no homeworkers. Enjoy nothing kids, you asked for it. A bit cruel, but a lot true.


 COMMENT 373582 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:39 AM

When I was younger my grandfather gave me a compass and a map. I'm still exploring.


 SDP agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:44 AM

Santa Barbara Athletic Club has a program for kids called Santa Barbara School of Squash. SBSOS.org The kids get squash lessons, time/tutoring with homework, and lots of opportunities to travel to tournaments in cities around CA. It's a great program.


 COMMENT 373589 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:48 AM

Unfortunately the parents or other family members are the responsible adults who need to get them involved in the many sports programs, clubs, "Big Brother" program, Boys & Girls club, scouting, music and many other good programs for youth available in the community. Also, some of the schools have programs, e.g. after schools programs, that the parents or teachers could encourage these youths to get involved in.


 COMMENT 373604 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 08:12 AM

Yes, let's rephrase this question as- I live in a neighborhood where a group of 12-yr boys seem to be abandoned by their parents and need mentoring. Are there groups that would help channel their energies into positive directions with very little if any assistance from the parents? Am not judging the parents, but if these are kids raised by single parents working full time then they probably have very little extra time to get them to positive activities.


 COMMENT 373614 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 08:42 AM

Depending on where they live it could be nearly impossible to get to the beach or the downtown rec center. 12 year-olds in a group ought to be able to take the bus but for the crazy people who report parents for child endangerment when children are out of their parents' sight. Growing up here no one ever did that. Now people call 911 if they see a child walking to a friend's house. This sounds absurd and extreme but it happens in SB all of the time!

Some activities with responsible adults: planting trees with Goleta Valley Beautiful where transport might be provided to and from work sites. I second Emma Jane Huerta's Upstarts Youth Theatre. The Page Youth Center on Hollister is for at-risk youth. Boys & Girls Club, YMCA, loads of martial arts studios in every neighborhood.


 COMMENT 373615 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 08:43 AM

The Unitarian Society of SB has a mentoring program through its RE program. Look em up and call to enquire...


 COMMENT 373628 agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 09:07 AM

I work as a mentor in an excellent program called Fighting Back through the CADA office. (cadasb.org) My mentee is now 12 and I have worked with him for 4 years now. This one is centered around keeping kids engaged in school and having a good role model. Big Brother and Boys and Girls Club are also worthwhile.


 COMMENT 373664P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 10:21 AM

I have a 12 year old boy, hope you're not including mine into that lump sum! He previously was in an afterschool program but his current school doesn't have one so he takes the bus home and does his homework and once that is done he is allowed to go outside to play basketball or skateboard until I get home. I felt more comfortable with him in the afterschool programs but now that he is in Jr. High it's not free anymore and I can't afford those other programs, or leave work to drive him to and from things. I personally think that the Boys & Girls clubs have less than adequate supervision and he is not allowed to go there. We tried that when he was younger and it was there that he was creating facebook and online dating accounts at 8 years old with the help of the teenagers who were going there.... not okay!


 ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 10:28 AM

Yes there are many actitives I know that but not everyone does and they come to Edhat to find out not cool to jump them Save your hostility for me I like it.


 COMMENT 373667P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 10:30 AM

Seriously 614? I doubt that ANYONE has ever called 911 because they saw a child walking to their friend's house (unless the child was 2 years old) yet you claim it happens "all of the time"

I agree there has been a startling upswing in paranoia but let's not exaggerate so much, ok?


 COMMENT 373868P agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:12 PM

To the poster, start with the parents. Most wayward children who are getting lost are a direct reflection of a problem in the home. If that is the case, then CADA's mentoring program is wonderful as a start, but perhaps a call to CPS is in order. It is hard to tell what is meant by lost, but if you mean abandoned, or missing adult supervision, then call CPS. 12 olds are still children, and the responsibility of their parents.


 AUNTIE S. agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-12 07:20 PM

Send (or take) them to the Boys & Girls Club. They specialize in "lost" kids like this. Lost can mean many things - and it looks like no one cares - nobody home, etc. The club could be their savior.


 CORKY agree helpful negative off topic

2013-02-14 04:35 PM

Just because there are lots of activities available, doesn't mean the boys would know how to access them.




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