npr edvertisers
visitors movie times

Santa Barbara Weather: 61.9°F | Humidity: 62% | Pressure: 30.05in (Steady) | Conditions: Scattered Clouds | Wind Direction: SW | Wind Speed: 2.7mph [see map]

Free Newsletter
  login You create the news! Send items of interest to ed@edhat.com
    17876 Subscribers
      545 Paid (3.0%)
     21 Commenters
     156315 Page Views

Buy Edhat Shirts
Buy Edhat Shirts
Buy Edhat Bags
Buy Edhat Bags
Advertise on Edhat
Advertise on Edhat
Buy Edhat Hats
Buy Edhat Hats
News Events Referrals Deals Classifieds Comments About

more articles like this

Scanner Reports 12-4-12
updated: Dec 05, 2012, 7:00 AM

By Roger the Scanner Guy

I just love living over here on South Milpas next to an idiot who tells everyone he comes in contact with that I'm mentally ill. Even old friends of mine that I have known for years give me weird looks now thanks to Herbert. Thank You Herbert. A woman came by to visit me one day he puts the make on her trying to get in her pants, (I can just imagine what he said to her about me) such a nice guy I'm sooooo Lucky I have Herbert as a neighbor to look out for me. Now he has a new roommate that every time he walks by stares at me in my little house as if he's looking at an animal in a cage. Hey! Someday Mr. Mental Illness 2012 just might turn into an animal in a cage. Isn't there crimes against harassing people with disabilities in this country?

The other day as I was speaking to the landlord he walks by flinging his arms in my direction and made vocal sounds as if telling me to "Shut Up". I'm sure my Care Taker Herbert has told everyone including the Police about my Mental Illness they will just excuse me as a 5150. I remember one time he told my land lord that I was talking to myself about killing people because my cat was missing. I probably was this being after Herbert told me that another neighbor was out to pay someone to kill my cats because they knew that by my cats being killed it would break me. Wow! Talk about a great set up for con control and to get someone kicked out of their apartment. Wow Herbert you're so cool I wish I was normal just like you than everyone would love me too. One day he went off on me because he thought I was writing about him on Edhat, talk about paranoia. He wanted to punch me out I was really scared, SNOT! One time he was mad at Belinda and said to me he was going to hire someone to kill her.

When I was a kid I got messed with a lot bullied and I thought I left that behind me when I grew up but I guess it just isn't true. Today I choose not to be a victim of bullying and that is one reason I'm writing about this. I thought after his last episode Herbert might learn to mind his own business and leave other people alone but it's not true he just does it quieter now. I hate to think that I may have to deal with the business of Justice to have a little serenity in my life. I won't hesitate to file charges against Herbert if I have to being left alone means just that. I don't bother him although he must be bothered by my living in the Kingdom of Herbert. As fart as being afraid if him I'm SNOT. I am however angry, when I was a kid I had a lot of bad things happen to me all because I didn't want to fight I just wanted to be left alone. There were several reasons why I did not fight back I was afraid, I did not know how to fight and my father would not teach me, I had asthma I couldn't breathe very well, There was usually more than one bully. I got ganged up on, I was also afraid of hurting someone because of my size.

My Grand Mother was always telling me "One Punch and that Sucka's down just close your eyes and swing!"I thought "Yea just one punch and they will be dead, then I'll be locked up for life." While I was younger I got beat up a lot pretty bad a few times, broken bones, a couple stab wounds I can handle a lot of pain. That is why I'm not scared of people like Herbert I can take a lot of pain I was trained well. The other side of the coin I don't want this stupid backward my thang is bigger than your thang drama in my life. DOG Forbid I should make it to Old Age if this is the way it's going to be in the Nursing Home. I don't think I could take anutter 30 beers of Herberts Macho Bullying.

Listening to the missing kid call from the High School bought this all up that is what I used to do when I was teased in school. After a while I started running away from home running, running, running...I'd get out on the Freeway and start hitching. I got pretty far a few times. Out on the Road other horrible things happened to me. I'm glad it didn't get that far with this kid at 15 he's a little older than I was when I started ran away from home. I thought I had no one no one wanted to deal with me and my problems so I left. Times sure have changed At least half of the police department was out there looking for Andrew as well as the High School Principal. I almost want to color my hair get it cut and go back to high school myself. Old Herbert would probably find out and enroll too.

There comes a time in your life when you can't run away anymore you gotta face whatever it is that makes you run away, or Quit another thing I have done many times is quit. I won't do it anymore I won't leave (unless I win the lottery) and I won't quit. I don't want Herbert to either I just want him to mind his own business or let the anger go because it's only slightly annoying. I don't tell people he's mentally ill I might say he's a JERK, But not mentally ill. You know what they say about people calling you names? Maybe if I call him a JERK, I'll become one my anxiety and depression will go away and he won't call me mentally ill anymore. Oh Well I'm over 50 now in fact I'm 54 and I'm kinda new at not running away, but I did it for many, many, years and I don't know how much time I have left on this Earth but I ain't running no more. Thank You Andrew for reminding me who I yam.

Well I got that Nasty, nasty cold that is going around I could open a SNOT factory with all that's coming out of me. Maybe it's my Karma for saying SNOT all the time. This one SUCKS Folks don't get it. One more Thang; December the fifth is Ballistic Belinda's Fifty Turd Birthday if you see her or know whom she is wish her Hoppy Birthday.

And with dat, hair is thy Scanner Roni Reports, Monday:

  • This came to me the other day although I'm sure someone else originally made it up: What the HELL is the use of Fighting? We're all going to die anyway. "415 Domestic Male vs Female La Casa De La Raza, female assaulted male. You don't read that everyday nor do you hear too many women protesting a woman clocking a man.
  • 23152 Driver with 2 juveniles in the vehicle leaving Taco Bell 800 Block of North Milpas street driving white Ford F-150 Partical ca. plate 8F??502 I especially found the last 3 numbers intresting.
  • Trespassing Homeless Type under the stairwell of a structure in the 400 Block of Orella Del Mar.
  • 100 Block of Juana Maria 2 Subjects doing drugs in an RV or so reporting party reported.
  • Armed Robbery Santa Maria Check into Cash.
  • Check the Welfare of a child living in a home that has no electricity, water, or heat. CPS was contacted.
  • Drunk can't Walk call Junipero at Bath.
  • 23152 Drunk Driver Westbound 246 from 101 2008 Chevy Pick Up registered to the great city of Lompoc.
  • 3500 Block of Black Road I-Pad theft.
  • 5150 Transport from Student health UCSB to GVCH.
  • 400 West Micheltorena theft investigation.
  • 800 Block of Cliff Drive 459 Burglary to residence.
  • 594 Vandalism to a black Honda investigation at the police station.
  • Bath and Sola bicyclists fighting no weapons, although subject on motorized bicycle told the otter he had a gun before pedaling away.
  • 400 Block of Bath landlord tenant 415, tenant reported landlord had something in his hand possibly a gun. Police arrived someone was detained I don't know who?
  • Possible 11-7 Intruder inside of home 2100 Block of Ridge Lane victim hiding in home police arrived detained subject don't know circumstances if it was a burglary or not.
  • 415 Domestic in a vehicle parking lot of the 99 Cent Store. What could they be fighting over everything is 99 cents?
  • 10851 Recovery investigation, that's stolen vehicle recovered 500 Block of Ripley.
  • Under the Influence female trying to get into cars 3800 Block of State Street Wells Fargo parking lot.
  • 459 to Residence 3600 Block of San Gabriel.
  • 4100 Block of Long Valley Road suspicious circumstances alarm signaling vehicle coming up road to structure but subject sees nothing there.
  • Check the Welfare of a female in the intersection of Bath and Ortega crying.
  • Hazard Investigation burning electrical odor in bathroom of 4 Square Church 50 East Alamar.
  • Threats Investigation market in 1200 Block of Santa Barbara street one male to another over a woman.

    Scanner Reports, Tuesday:

  • This cold or flu whatever it is really SUCKS!
  • Terrible early morning accident on 246 9 people injured 2 serious. One guy got out of his car and was hit by another car I hope everyone pulls through.
  • Non-injury traffic accident vehicle vs bicycle 132 Harbor Way.
  • 415 Domestic 600 Block of East Anapamu possible 242 Assault.
  • Suspicious Circumstances on La Marina would not say what but there is something suspicious there.
  • 7200 Block of Del Norte suspicious subject loitering around home reporting party called homeowner and no one is supposed to be there subject seen entering home through door and coming out with a hand full of rags. Who knows why?
  • 20002 Hit and Run Silver Jag elder female driver occurred near Biltmore vehicle last seen west toward cemetery that's a good place to hide they will NEVER look there.
  • Special Needs Child Missing from SBHS for a few hours worried some of us sicker than we already are. Good Samaritan reported seeing him at Quarantina and Nopalito, and was following the boy changed direction went up Mason then police arrived kid ran they got him running in the other direction from McDonalds.
  • Suspicious Subject in the 400 Block of East Valerio claiming to be a rep. of Cox Cable, going door to door.
  • Parole Search in the 100 Block of Santa Ynez.
  • 300 Block of Voluntario assistance needed to restrain 5150.
  • Suicidal subject has been drinking in a motel on upper State Street.
  • Another suicidal subject with a box cutter behind CVS Pharmacy 1200 Block of Coast Village Road as police approached it sounds like she cut herself because code 3 Fire and Medics were requested.
  • 415 Over a parking spot possibly resulted in fender bender First East DLG.
  • How come we can't all just get along even if we hate each otters friggen guts! It's ok to want to run someone through a Wood Chipper we just don't do it. One SECOND at a time We are Wood Chippers Anonymous.
  • Minor injury traffic accident involving a motor scooter 3025 DLV In front of Trader Joes.
  • Check the Welfare of a subject screaming in the building at 617 Garden Street.
  • Check the Welfare of a subject down in the Chapala Market parking lot.
  • Carrillo and Anacapa report of White BMW Smoking marijuana.
  • 40 East Anapamu subject exposing himself Hispanic male adult 20-30 wearing some black clothing.
  • 1200 Block of East Gutierrez man threatened to kill wife and is now lying on sofa although SNOT for long. He's lucky he aien't married to Ballistic Belinda or he might be running around in circles right now looking for wee wee.

    Will that's it outta me for now gotta ride out this nasty illness I got Niagara Falls dripping out of my nose Rotten Scrap! Dog Willing We Will see you on FRYday. Roger

    Comments in order of when they were received | (reverse order)

     COMMENT 350388 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 07:32 AM

    happy birthday belinda!


     COMMENT 350394P agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 07:52 AM

    .....OK. .....thanks Roger


     COMMENT 350396 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 07:59 AM

    "•Carrillo and Anacapa report of White BMW Smoking marijuana". Now CARS are smoking weed??


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 08:26 AM

    Anyone seen my ANTI-Deppressents Aien't never clamed to be Normal! Cars have always smoked weed...


     COMMENT 350408 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 08:31 AM

    Happy Birthday Belinda.... now be nice to Roger; just take it one day at a time.


     COMMENT 350417P agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 08:53 AM

    Feel better Roger! Sorry you got the cold, maybe it will strengthen your immunity system and you won't get any more all season!


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 09:31 AM

    That would be nice but I also have a recently discovered hernia that hurts like hell everytime I cough., or sneeze! Thank You.


     COMMENT 350445 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 09:41 AM

    Get some vitamin c and take it every day and keep your fingers off your face!!! Get a mirror and face it towards the badness. In no time at all, the nastiness just diasappears. Just put it right on the outside wall next to your window. I even made a mirror necklace, maybe I will drop it off to you next time I am in your hood.


     COMMENT 350525 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 11:53 AM

    Just more proof that early childhood trauma often leads to a life of victimhood.


     COMMENT 350534 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 12:03 PM

    I had plenty of childhood trauma, but don't wrong me, you will be cursed. Not my fault,that I have a guardian angel who equalizes everything quite nicely.


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 12:35 PM

    I'm sorry I wrote about Herbert it's not his real name. He really bothers me because he's always trying to con someone so he can use them in his life. If they don't act accordinly he intimadates them, sets them up, even calls the police on them it really angers me and I get obsessed about it. Of course if he wasn't my neighbor there would be some other ars living there. I have no options it's not like I have money so I could just move somewhere else even then I don't want to move. Writing about the jerk is a total waste of time...Jerk, jerk,jerk..


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 12:35 PM

    I was cursed when I was baptised catholic.


     COMMENT 350612 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 03:52 PM

    Hi, Roger: Where is your landlord during all this high drama with Herbert? I guarantee you that if I were the landlord and one of my tenants was harassing another one, the guilty party would be evicted quicker than you could say "sorry about my boot-print on your buttocks, oh, wait, you know, I'm really not." I can't believe he's aware of what's going on and does nothing about it.

    Happy Birthday Belinda!


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 06:46 PM

    My landlord likes the guy, I don't want to see him tossed either just want to be left alone. The land lord would have never known if HERBERT did not call the police on BB and try to get her booted. The police told me to call the land lord in the morning that day, and it was a good thing because HERBERT was on his way over there. Apprently though HERBERT offended other neighbors and he was already in trouble for that. HERBERT just choose to blame me for everything prehaps it's because I figured him out to a degree. We were friends though and I enjoyed the friendship. I think it's his drinking he turns into a real jerk when he drinks. It's too bad I hope it doesn't result in all of us getting tossed they all kind of treat me bad because I'm on section 8 plus I'm not all there like they are..lol When HERBERT moved in a few years back he told all of us that he had done hard time and was from South Central I think he likes to intimadate people and be in charge. It's really too bad because he can be a real nice guy. Our hard lives clashed I'm not a take over type I'm kinda like a Magalla Gorilla gentle giant type..Belinda can be a pain but I love her she is like my little Sister I don't like it when people mess with her anyway I probably shouldn't write about it but I get my anger out when I write about it. I don't want to be violent anymore and at the same time I can't be a tough guy anymore I'm starting to have health problems..Lifes too short for all that horse manure anyway.. Oh I gotta go breaking nudes.


     COMMENT 350692P agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 07:06 PM

    Roger, I write about scrap, but I either do it by hand, or delete a draft email.. Just don't make things harder on yourself! I'm not scolding, just sharing. Be careful, you got to look out for #1 -- You. (please no pee jokes)


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 08:21 PM

    I know sometimes I just gotta dump though no pun intended..Something gets to you feel like no ones on your side..I feel better now although I'm ill.. Thanks for Caring.


     COMMENT 350754 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-05 11:24 PM

    Hay Roger , I hope you fill better then you did yesterday,, Is it a spoon full of sugar that helps med. go down or a few buns from next door ? We'll have to check it out tomorrow.. tell Belinda Happy Birthday for me would ya . See you tomorrow...


     COMMENT 350794 agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-06 08:14 AM

    Geez, Roger, get a better place!


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-06 09:08 AM

    I can't I'm poor If it wasn't for the travel channels I wouldn't go on vacation.


     ROGER DODGER agree helpful negative off topic

    2012-12-06 09:22 AM

    Oh good if I can breathe I can hit Shakey up for a ride to Fresh and Easy..


    55% of comments on this page were made by Edhat Community Members.



    Add Your Comments

    Edhat Username



    Don't have an Account?

    Don't know if you have an account?

    Don't remember your account info?


    ENJOY HAPPY HOUR! ... Between 4:00pm & 5:00pm only happy comment are allowed on the Edhat Comments Board.

    If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all.

    Hide Your Handle, but show paid status (paid subscribers only)
    NEW - use verified name and picture (contact ed@edhat.com to be verified)
    Find out About Becoming A Paid Subscriber
    NOTE: We are testing a new Comment Preview Page. You must hit OK on the next page to have your comment go live. Send Feedback to ed@edhat.com.

    get a handle   |  lost handle




      See more articles like this

    # # # #


    Send To a Friend
    Your Email
    Friend's Email

    Top of Page | Old News Archives | Printer-Friendly Page

      Home Subscribe FAQ Jobs Contact copyright © 2003-2015  
    Edhat, Inc.