August 8, 2006 - Dear Dr. Laura

Edhat has often spoken of the homogenization of our local shopping and dining scene. Chain retailers and restaurants are moving into town faster than the local ones can leave. Local flavor is quickly turning Frappacino. On Sunday the battle against the Orange-County-fication of Santa Barbara made it to the next level. No matter what you think about the on-goings at the News-Press, you should be alarmed that our local paper has hired Dr. Laura to write a bi-weekly LOCAL column. In her very first column this weekend, she pleaded with local citizens to put pressure on local politicians to increase the amount of money spent on police. “We don’t have enough police officers,” she said (in all upper case letters).

Her argument centered on the fact that Newport Beach – “another relatively wealthy tourist city” - has better police response times.

In other words, why can’t we be more like Orange County?

In a nutshell, this is what is going wrong in our little blue town in the big blue state by the big blue sea. People are fleeing from the congestion, crime and pressure of large urban areas, but once here, they are eschewing the virtues of their former regions. They’re bringing their money and their power and their influence to a beautiful place, but they can’t just sit back and enjoy it. They have to mold it and fix it and rebuild it into something with their name on it.

This isn’t about the issue of police protection, nor is it about the My-Beach-My-Wave mentality. It isn’t even about liking or disliking Dr. Laura. It’s about respect for the people and the place. Dr. Laura, who obviously found Santa Barbara to be a better place to live than where she lived before, has wasted no time in giving us small town beachbillies an unsolicited scolding, and a fix-it list.

Maybe Barney isn’t the most exciting writer this side of San Marcos Pass, but with over 40 years of local journalistic experience, he certainly qualifies as a legitimate voice of Santa Barbara. Edhat also works hard at earning that legitimacy.

But, Dr. Laura is out of line and out of touch. She can no more speak to, of, or from Santa Barbara than we can have a Solstice Parade without drums. And, her insinuation into the position of local authority is insulting to anyone who has ever called Santa Barbara home.

Hopefully her column will be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, where we all finally say enough and save what’s left of our community. But, it might also be the final nail in the crate – the one that used to say Goleta Lemons and now says Orange County.

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