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Advise Yourself

Comments in order of when they were received | (reverse order)

 COMMENT 322997P helpful negative off topic

2012-09-22 11:45 AM

Terrific piece Kelsey. You are obviously doing it right - learning from you mistakes. If you are not making mistakes, you are not learning. It is from our mistakes we grow.

 

 COMMENT 323002P helpful negative off topic

2012-09-22 11:53 AM

it's great that you recognize the next ten years of your life will be an eye opener. travel the world, volunteer some time with those less fortunate than you, keep an open mind when it comes to unfamiliar cultures, especially those that represent different geopgraphic, ethnic, religious, social and economic backgrounds. santa barbara is a unique microcosm, it's a wonderful place but it's such a small slice of rose colored reality. it's to shake the dominant ideologies held by your peers which can lead some serious cognitive dissonance when you begin to experience the world for what it is.

 

 COMMENT 323022 helpful negative off topic

2012-09-22 12:58 PM

That bumper sticker.... wow.... if that's the "prevailing wisdom" out there we're doomed!!

 

 COMMENT 323073 helpful negative off topic

2012-09-22 03:52 PM

When I was in high school, I had a lot of friends, but didn't go to parties. I didn't date or have a boyfriend, and it seemed like everyone did. I used to think "if only I had a boyfriend, everything would be okay". I tried to do well in my classes, and had mostly A's and B's. My Mom was on the school board at the time, and my future was somewhat planned out. I would live at home, and go to Jr. College for two years, then transfer to a four year. In the middle of my Junior year, my Mom passed away. The rest of high school I just did enough to slide by. At 35, I have tried college so many times, and just can't seem to finish. I have a lot of big plans, and not the follow thru. I wish I would have done many things different then, and thru the years. The earlier you can learn that, the better. I enjoyed your article. You are fortunate to realize so much at your age.

 

 COMMENT 323107P helpful negative off topic

2012-09-22 05:06 PM

Don't worry, you're still adolescent! Enjoy it. As bad as it can feel, I think you'll look back on it fondly. Yes, a thoughtful piece.

 

 COMMENT 323123 helpful negative off topic

2012-09-22 05:28 PM

73 You are an amazing person being able to get thru such a traumatic experience at such a young age. I wish there was something I could say to encourage you at this still young age of 35. Don't ever give up, but realize that maybe the reason you aren't following thru with your plans is because you may be depressed, there is no greater grief than losing a beloved mother. Maybe you just need a little counseling and encouragement to help you move ahead and realize those dreams. You will never look back and regret at least giving those dreams a chance. You owe it to yourself.

Unfortunately there are many young people experiencing just what you went thru and maybe by moving ahead you will be able to help some of them cope with their loss.

 

 COMMENT 323125 helpful negative off topic

2012-09-22 05:30 PM

Surrender and humility are good qualities; seasoned also with righteous anger and willingness to fight for change.

They say there are two times of enlightenment in a man's life: in his late adolescence and again at midlife. Choices made about self at those two transition times define what is to come next.

Midlife is the time to shed the persona we constructed to survive and re-aquaint ourselves with the authentic self living down there inside our being too.

I am glad you are free enough from the clutter to modern life to have had this time of personal reflection. Remember the gut has more nerve endings and connections than the brain - life is a marriage between both gut and head feelings. Keep listening to both.

Thank you for sharing these thoughts with us.

 

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